


You Found Me

by TheReckless1611



Category: Elyza Lex (Fanverse), Lexark - Fandom, The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alicia Clark - Freeform, Alternate Universe - The 100 (TV) Fusion, Angst, Drugs, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Multi, Queer the walking dead - Freeform, References to Drugs, Smut, Suicide Attempt, alicia/elyza, elyza lex - Freeform, elyza/alicia, lexark
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-06-30
Packaged: 2018-06-03 17:07:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 32,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6619117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheReckless1611/pseuds/TheReckless1611
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alicia feels lonely and decides to look for comfort somewhere else. She was starting to give up on going through the radio channels when the heavy Australian accent filled her ears</p>
<p>“This is Coin FM where we play nothing but coin related songs and that of course was 50 Cent.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys... It's been ages since I last wrote a fic so I hope you all like it.  
> And I'm REALLY sorry about any grammar mistakes. English is not my first language but I did the best that I could.

Alicia felt lonely to say the least. Yes, she was in a boat with her family, Ofelia, Daniel and Strand but she couldn’t help but feel suffocatingly lonely. Nick was either with Strand or in his own little world, Chris was still mourning his mother’s death, Ofelia was in pain and deadly quiet and the adults…well it was impossible talking to them considering the fact that they had other things to worry about other than some lonely teenager. The brunette would spend the whole day looking into the horizon or staring up to her bedroom’s ceiling and felling the ocean move underneath the boat. 

All she wanted was someone to talk to; Not someone to open up to - it was too soon to talk about Matt and how her life had exploded into a chaotic mess in a matter of seconds – but someone who she could simply talk about everything and nothing at the same time, someone to distract her from the end of the world, even if it was just for a few moments. 

And it was that need that leaded Alicia to sit on the deck’s couch and go through the radio channels, looking for some sort of human contact. Alicia fiddled with the buttons, getting nothing but weird noises until a hoarse voice filled the air. 

“This is Coin FM where we play nothing but coin related songs and that of course was 50 Cent.” Alicia sighed, relieved by the heavily accented woman on the other side that managed to yank a laugh out of the brunette, making her snort lightly.

“What was that?”

The teenager froze, just then realizing she was holding the speak button.

“Hello?” Asked the mechanic distorted voice. “Please answer or I’ll be sure I’m finally going insane.” 

Alicia caressed the speak button with her thumb, considering either she should answer or not. It was danger after all. They were in a boat filled with supplies and there were too many people out there with nothing but their clothes.

“Helloooo?” The woman on the other side tried once again. “Hello? Is it me you’re looking for?” she sang in what sounded like and Australian accent, getting a smile into Alicia’s lips.

“I’m here.” Alicia answers shyly. 

“Thank God!” The voice sighed in relief. “What’s your name, love?” Alicia kept quiet, still unsure if that was a good idea. “You’re the shy kind, aren’t you? Well, I’m Elyza. Elyza Lex. And I’m from Australia in case you still hadn’t noticed by the panty dropper accent.”

Alicia brought the speaker closer to her lips, but couldn’t led herself to say a single world.

“Still not talking? Are you even real? I mean, the sun has been frying my head for the past week but I don’t think I’m that far into bat shit craziness to be hearing voices.”

“You talk a lot.” The brunette finally answers. Nice one, Alicia. Judging people it’s a great start.

“Sorry about that little miss radio silence.”

“Alicia. Alicia Clark.” Alicia rolled her eyes at the nickname. “Do you sing to everyone you find on the radio?” 

“Jealous already, love?” She lay back, staring at the sky and rolling her eyes once again. “But no, just for the ones that sound pretty.”

“Sound pretty?” The brunette smiled, amused by the girl’s antics. “So you also flirt with everyone who comes on the radio?”

“Sorry, love. I just heard the ‘comes on the radio’ part. Are you suggesting post apocalyptical radio sex? Cause if you are, I’m up for it.”

Alicia rolled to her side, smiling widely. It felt like ages since the last time she smiled and now this stranger was making her cheeks hurt with the stupid comments and weird flirting. In some sort of way, that was exactly was Alicia was looking for; Someone to pull her away from the though reality.

“Not going to happen.”

“Damn…” Elyza whined. “But I can hear the smile in your voice so totally worth it.”

Yes, it was worth it.

It didn’t take long before Alicia was opening up to Elyza, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. They had met each other for at least a few hours and Alicia couldn’t find the words to describe how natural it felt talking to the older girl. They could go from deep philosophical talks to discussing which was the best season of Dance Moms in a matter of seconds. 

Maybe it was easy because Alicia couldn’t see the person on the other side. It is strangely easier to talk about certain things when you’re not looking into one’s eyes and even thought they were fast friends Alicia could certainly say that Elyza was not the judging type and that made everything easier. 

“Favorite movie.” Alicia asks with a smile. They were playing twenty questions for the past two hours. According to Elyza it had turned into ‘a fuck ton of questions’.

“This one is hard.” Elyza went dead silent for a while, thinking about the question. Alicia had been dying to ask that given the fact tha Elyza would throw references here and there like a good movie nerd, but the course of the game would always lead her the other way. “I think I have to go with A Clockwork Orange.”

“Great choice.” Alicia smiled widely. She had moved from the deck to her room as soon as the night fell, hiding from everyone. She didn’t wanted to explain the total stranger who was making her laugh her ass off.

“Have you ever been with a girl?” She could almost hear the amusement in Elyza’s voice.

“Took you long enough.” The brunette rolled her eyes. With all the obvious flirting the Australian was doing Alicia knew it was only a matter of time until that question would come up.

“Am I that predictable?”

“A little.”

“I’m offended.” Alicia smiled, placing the radio on the bedside table so she could get more comfortable in her new bed. “So?”

“I have kissed a girl.” She felt her cheeks burning red. That was one thing she had never told anyone. “But no sex”. 

“Nice!” Alicia laughed, hearing the smirk in Elyza’s voice. “Did you enjoyed it?”

“I thought we were going for one question each.”

“Fuck that, I’m changing the rules. Was it good?”

“It was interesting.” Alicia mumbled, remembering the experience. “And messy. We were both straight girls experiencing. Neither had any idea what to do with ourselves and it ended up  
being a little weird.”

“The famous friendly experimentation.” Elyza laughed on the other side. “Never gets old.”

“Do you have any tattoos?” Alicia tried to drop the subject.

“Yes. An incomplete infinity symbol on my shoulder blade.” 

“Why is it incomplete?” the brunette asked casually, looking at the dirt underneath her nails.

The radio went dead silent and Alicia furrowed her browns, scared she had asked something inappropriate.

“Cause I’m not complete.” Elyza finally answered, the playful tone disappearing from her voice. “Cause I feel empty.”

Alicia cursed herself in her mind. They were going so well and she had to destroy everything with a stupid question but then again they would end up falling into more delicate subjects sooner or later. They couldn’t talk about which dirty LA dinner had the most delicious disgusting food forever. 

“I have one too.” The teenager traced her fingers over the heart Matt had drawn in her fore arm. She missed him so much. “It’s this crazy designed heart my boyfriend drew. His name was Matt.”

“What happened to him?” Elyza asked carefully.

“He probably turned into a walker but I hope he got lucky and ended up actually dead.” Alicia felt the tears rolling down her cheeks. “I couldn’t save him.”

“You can’t save everyone, Leeshy.” Elyza said softly. “But you can create happy memories so they won’t regret about living boring lives when their time finally comes.” 

Alicia sighed felling tired and looked at her watch. It was three in the morning already and she felt like she could use some sleep, even thought she was sure she would end up thinking about Matt the whole night and end up not sleeping at all.

“I should go to sleep. It’s really late.” The brunette sat in her bed and started to strip from her flannel shirt and jeans to get more comfortable. “You should get some sleep too.”

“I don’t do sleep in a long time, love.” Elyza sighs tiredly and Alicia understood immediately. Even thought Elyza was tired she just couldn’t sleep. “But have sweet dreams, Buttercup. We’ll talk tomorrow, yes?”

“Yeah.” Alicia rolled on her side, trying to hold in the tears. “Good night, Elyza.”

Alicia rolled around in her bed, her mind racing everywhere and the tears making her pillow wet. She shouldn’t have talked about Matt even if she did it to try and make Elyza feel better. That was one thing about Alicia’s personality that she hated. She would worry so much about making others happy and forget about her own feelings. She felt bad about making Elyza sad and now she couldn’t sleep herself.

She thought about Matt one more time and how he would talk about random things until she fell asleep with a smile in her lips. Damn, she missed him. She really missed him and all she could do about it was feel and get suffocated by her own guilty for not fighting harder to help him even though she knew after seeing what she saw that once you were bitten there was not much to do.

Alicia looked at her clock one more time. One hour and half had passed but it felt like an eternity.

“Leeshy…” Elyza’s voice came back into the radio like the answer to her prayers. She couldn’t stand being alone with her thoughts anymore. “I was wondering… Do you think Bear Grylls is alive?” Alicia sniffed and laughed between tears. “I never bought that he actually had all of those survival skills. Do you think he is still alive or that he turned into this bug eater zombie?”

Alicia turned around with a soft smile playing in her lips and grabbed the radio speaker.

“I’m sure he is still alive.” The teenager answered with a raspy crying voice which Elyza knew better than to ask her about it. “The guy has mad skills.”

“You say that cause you still haven’t seen my skills, love.”

“I’m looking forward to that.”


	2. Chapter 2

Alicia smiled lightly while placing a forkful of scrambled eggs in her mouth. She was felling refreshed after a good night of sleep thanks to Elyza’ stories and completely random thoughts. For starters the blonde gave her a list of reasons why Bear Grylls would be dead already, followed by a narration of a documentary she watched on Shark Week about a prehistoric shark that was still alive and could eat whole whales and even boats. Alicia didn’t believed a word about it, but Elyza sounded very sure that the gigantic fish actually existed. Before the teenager finally fell asleep she laughed when Elyza told her about a bar fight she got into back in Australia because a guy wouldn’t believe she could drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels by herself in just one swallow. By the time the girl on the radio started to throw useless curiosities at her, Alicia’s eyes were already too heavy to keep going but she remembered that Elyza’s last words were ‘did you knew that a duck’s donger is the shape of a corkscrew?’

“What’s up with you today?” Nick asked his sister, biting into his toast.

“I had a good night of sleep, that’s all.” Alicia shrugged.

“Me too, and you don’t see me smiling like an idiot.”

“Can’t a girl feel happy?” 

Alicia knew she could trust her brother, but she didn’t want to risk someone taking the radio away from her and giving her a lecture about how dangerous it was to talk to strangers considering the situation they were in. The teenager wasn’t stupid. She may have grown close to Elyza within a day, but she wasn’t risking her family for the girl. She knew she could never tell anyone about their location even if she felt a strong necessity of saving everyone within her reach.

“Considering that we are living the apocalypse, no.”

“You have nothing to worry about, Nick.” She reassured her brother. “I just woke up feeling better than I was. That’s all.”

“If you say so.” Nick watched as Alicia stood up from her chair and made her way towards her bedroom. 

No matter what Alicia would say, he wasn’t buying that ‘good night of sleep’ talk. That was the first time in ages that he was able to properly be around his sister but he knew better. Nick and Alicia grew up like flesh and bones, always together, not only siblings but also best friends. After Nick started doing drugs they drifted apart and he couldn’t blame the girl for being angry at him in a daily basis, but he still cared about Alicia, he always cared about his sister. 

Nick never knew where he was going to with his life, but now everyone was following him into de unknown and he felt the need to help and the opportunity to get everything back on track with his family. If Alicia was doing something that could put them and herself into trouble then he would do everything in his hands to stop her and save her from falling into the wheel of bad decisions that he once fell into.

It was a big boat and Alicia was tired of being in her bedroom. With the radio in her hands, the brunette walked to the back of the boat where the blue sofas were waiting to spent one more day with her doing nothing at all. Somehow everyone ended up recognizing that that was Alicia’s place and wouldn’t bother her when she was sitting in the soft cushions, staring at nothing at all.

“Are you awake?” Alicia said into the radio.

“Good morning Leeshy-Loo!” The teenager smiled by hearing the new nickname, but she couldn’t help but notice that Elyza’s voice sounded a little more raspy than the day before. “I was waiting for you.”

“Sorry, I was having breakfast with my brother.”

“Oh God! You have food?” Elyza moaned.

“Yep.” Alicia answered, getting more comfortable in the couch before realizing her mistake. She couldn’t talk about information like that. 

“I would let a dingo fuck me in the ass for some food and a glass of water.”

“That sounds desperate.” Of course it sounds desperate, you idiot. It’s the apocalypse.

”I’ve been drifting in the ocean for a whole week now, I don’t know what you expected, love.”

“Wait, drifting?” Alicia suddenly got worried.

“Yes. When the bombing started I grabbed the first boat I saw. My idea was to stay in the ocean until the coast was a little calmer. The boat’s engine stopped working out of nowhere and I got stuck. A few hours in and I realized I couldn’t even see the shore anymore.” Elyza explained. “All I have is a first aid kit, a gun with only one bullet, an empty bottle of vodka and a bubblegum. Let’s say I’m not the most prepared person out there.”

“Sorry about that.” Alicia mumbled. She felt horrible for not being able to do something. Even if she told Elyza where they were it was impossible for her to get to Strand’s boat without and engine. The only thing Alicia was sure was that Elyza wasn’t too far away or they wouldn’t be speaking through a medium range radio.

“Don’t be. Just talk to me and distract me from my misery.” 

“Where were you when it all started?” The brunette asked, trying to chance the focus of the conversation.

“Good question. So I was going to med school, I was in my second year and I was doing an internship at the college’s morgue.” Elyza took a deep breath and cleared her throat. If what she was saying was truth, Alicia couldn’t even imagine how dry the Australian’s throat was. “As you can imagine considering it’s a bunch of dead people, a morgue can be bloody boring. Lucky me my boss was this red headed MILF whose husband couldn't make her come even if his life depended on it and we would fuck when things would get way to dead.” Alicia rolled her eyes hearing Elyza laugh at her own bad joke. “So one day we were fucking and the dead started to rise. She passed out from the scare and I ran away. The rest it’s just story.”

“You left her behind?” Alicia asked, open mouthed.

“I had no choice. She would slow me down and I wasn’t feeling like dying that day.” Elyza’s voice suddenly turned dead serious. “It wasn’t the worst thing I had to do in order to survive. Once you are by yourself you have to look at your own back and nothing else cause if you don’t do it no one is going to do it for you, Alicia.”

Alicia looked away into the horizon, realizing for the first time how lucky she was for her family. Madison tried to keep Alicia away from the reality as much as she could and just now the teenager realized that it was for her own good. She couldn’t image herself leaving someone to die, stealing from other survivors or killing one of the walkers even though she knew they were nothing but moving corpses. 

“What about you, love?” Elyza pulled her away from her thoughts. “Tell me you lovely apocalypse story.”

The brunette took a deep breath, remembering her old life. Her school, Matt, her friends and the Berkeley acceptance letter. She wasn’t ready to talk about it, not yet. 

“It was all over before I knew it started. It was all over.” It was everything she managed to say and the silence in the other end showed that Elyza understood that she wasn’t ready. The Australian knew better than to push Alicia into opening up. “So, med school? That’s impressive.”

“Thanks, love. Who would say that the Aussie troublemaker would turn into a Berkley girl.”

“Wait. Berkley?” Alicia asked, surprised. What were the chances? “I was going to Berkley. I had just received my acceptance letter.”

“Are you bloody serious?” The brunette could hear the excitement in Elyza’s voice. “Damn Buttercup, sounds like we were meant to find each other one way or another.”

“It seems like it.” She smiled widely. Alicia wasn’t the one to believe in destiny but she couldn’t deny that she was open mouthed with the situation. 

“Leeshy, can I ask you something?” Elyza’s voice had turned soft and caring.

“Of course you can.” Alicia rolled her eyes. Wasn’t their whole relationship based on that?

“Can you describe yourself to me? I want to give a face to the voice that has been making my life less horrible for the past twenty four hours.”

“Hum… Ok, I guess.” Alicia licked her lips, trying to think how she would do that. Describing herself isn’t something most people need to do or even think about doing but she would give it a try. She wanted to do that for Elyza. “I have long brown hair and green eyes. Average height and weight, full lips… I don’t know Elyza. I never described myself before.” She stopped talking, felling her cheeks getting hotter. It was way too weird.

“You were doing fine.” Elyza almost whispered. “And you look beautiful, Leeshy-Loo.”

“Thanks.” Alicia blushed deeply. “What about you? What do you look like?”

“Hot as fuck.” The brunette laughed loudly at Elyza’s response and quickly covered her mouth not to call attention. “Blonde, blue eyes, great boobs… You should see me, I’m awesome.”

“You sure know how to impress a woman, Elyza.” Alicia said ironically.

“Who are you talking to?”

Alicia jumped from her spot on the couch, staring back at a suspicious looking Nick.

“You should see what I can do with my tongue, love.” Elyza’s voice echoed through the radio and Alicia pressed the mute button on it to silence the blonde for a few moments.

“You’ve been talking to someone on the radio?” Nick walked closer to his sister with his arms crossed over his chest. “Alicia, do you realize how dangerous that is?”

“I’m not stupid, Nick.” The teenager rolled her eyes. “But Elyza is not dangerous. She won’t attack us. She doesn’t even know where she is. She’s just floating in a boat for days with nowhere to go.”

“What guarantees you she’s not lying?” Alicia opened her mouth but nothing came out. Elyza could be a huge liar for everything she knew. “What if someone intercepts into our radio and hears you two talking? They could come after us for our supplies. They would kill us, Alicia.”

“Nick it’s just… She… I don’t…” The girl fought with her own words, not finding a proper way to defend her actions. Nick was right, it was dangerous but Elyza would make her feel so safe and less stressed out. She was blinded by how good she started to feel since she had found Elyza talking nonsense on the radio and singing a Lionel Richie song for her.

“I’m keeping this.” Nick said grabbing the radio. Alicia tried to stop him but he was stronger than her. “It’s for your own good. It’s for our family’s safeness.”

Alicia watched as Nick walked away with the radio in his hands, Elyza being taken away from her as easy as she had appeared.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really happy you're all liking this!  
> Oh, and don't give up on reading this chapter in the middle of it. Just trust me and remember I'm not Jason Rottenburguer.

It had been three days since Nick had taken the radio away from her and Alicia haven’t slept since. She was felling alone and bored all over again, but mostly Alicia was worried about Elyza. She couldn’t get past the fact that the blonde was all alone in the ocean with no food or water. She was scared that Elyza wouldn’t make it. She was scared that she would end up losing someone else. 

And it were those worries that lead Alicia to get into Nick’s room while he was asleep after lunch and steal the radio back. She felt bad mainly because she understood Nick’s reasons, but she couldn’t keep going without knowing if Elyza was alive and well. 

Alicia ran back to her bedroom and turned the radio on.

“Elyza?” The brunette called, her heart beating extremely hard. “Elyza are you in there? Answer me for fuck sake!” Alicia felt tears forming in her eyes. What if she was gone? “Elyza!”

“You don’t have to scream, Leeshy-Loo.” Elyza’s raspy voice echoed through her bedroom in nothing but a whisper. 

“Thank God!” Alicia breathed out. “I’m so sorry. My brother Nick took the radio away from me.”

“It’s ok. I’m glad you’re back. That way I won’t be alone.” The brunette furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. “You know what sucks about have gone to med school? You know how the human body works, therefore you know when it’s collapsing completely.”

Alicia lost her voice completely. That was it. She was losing Elyza just like she had lost Matt. She was failing on saving someone again and couldn’t help but feel completely useless. Just like she had no idea how she could have saved her boyfriend, she also had no idea how she could save Elyza, but she was willing to try harder had she been given more time.

“My head is spinning, my stomach feels like it’s eating my insides and my throat is so dry that I can barely talk.” Alicia held the radio speaker closer to her heart as she heard Elyza cough in pain. “My skin is completely burned by the sun and I honestly think I’m going insane, Alicia. Everything I see is water. I’m torn between using my last bullet to try and get some attention to be rescued or shooting my own brain out. I must say that the second option sounds very tempting right now.”

“Elyza listen to me.” Alicia felt her voice cracking. Her eyes were watering and she didn’t think she would be able to hold in her tears for too long. “I’m going to find you, okay? I’ll talk to Strand. There must be a way to use the radio signal to find out where you are. You’ll be fine.”

“You know better than that, Leeshy-Loo.” 

Yes, she knew better than that. Strand would never change his plans to go after some stranger and the others wouldn’t accept someone else in their already ‘crowded’ boat. Elyza was slipping through her fingers.

“I’m just really sad I won’t ever be able to complete my tattoo because I found the missing piece. It was you, Leeshy.” Alicia pressed her lips together and allowed the tears to fall from her eyes. “I might be lacking everything a human being needs to survive, but I finally feel whole. The emptiness is gone and that’s because of you Alicia, so thank you. Thank you for showing me how it feels like to be complete.”

“Please Elyza, don’t go.” Alicia cried, felling her chest tighter.

“May we meet again, love.”

Static took over the radio as Alicia held her knees close to her chest and cried.

 

Alicia felt completely numb. She had isolated herself in the back of the boat and stared into the ocean for what seemed to be hours. One second Elyza was so close and then, out of nowhere, she was gone, taking away her own life in an act of mercy.

Madison saw her daughter’s puffy and red face from all the crying and tried to talk to the teenager, but Alicia just said she wanted to be alone and walked away. The blonde woman respected Alicia’s space above all of her concerns. She knew her daughter. Alicia would come to her sooner or later and Madison would be able to help her. Little did she knew that Alicia didn’t needed her help for a long time now. Not since all of Madison’s efforts turned to Nick and the brunette had to grow up and face life by herself. Alicia was always alone, but never felt as lonely as she was felling right now.

Alicia tore her eyes away from the moving water and started into the horizon. Not too far away something caught her gaze and the girl ran to the front of the boat, grabbing a binocular on her way there. With the device’s help Alicia saw a small boat, a hand hanging outside of it.

“Strand! Stop the boat.” Alicia screamed, already running in the direction of the speedboat they used to make quick journeys to land.

“What is happening?” Ofelia mumbled like a little scared animal.

“There is someone out there!” Alicia said pointing at the boat’s direction while untying the speedboat. 

“We are not stopping.” Strand answered from his driving spot at the boat’s higher place. “No one is getting in.”

“What if they’re dying?” Alicia shouted back pissed by the man’s words. “I’m not going to just stand here!”

Alicia got into the speedboat despite Strand and Madison’s judgement and before she could speed up the boat Chris jumped in. 

“I’m helping you.” The boy said with soft eyes. 

Chris understood Alicia. He wasn’t able to save his mother, but he could save someone else as well. What if the person in the boat had a son? What if they had lost someone and was felling miserable too? More than anything Chris wanted to kill every single walker to revenge his mother, but as long they were in the ocean and couldn’t do that he was going to make himself useful for others. He would help no matter what.

They finally arrived near the engine-less speed boat and Alicia jumped in it not thinking twice, while Chris tied the two speedboat’s together. A blonde woman was lying face down on the boat and to the teenagers relief, there wasn't blood anywhere to be seen.

“She’s alive.” Alicia stated seeing that the woman’s back was moving with her breath. 

The brunette grabbed the body and turned it around with Chris’ help. Alicia looked down to the woman and felt her heart skipping a beat. Blonde hair, great boobs… could it be?

Alicia grabbed at the leather jacket the blonde was wearing and pulled it to the side, revealing the incomplete infinity tattoo.

Elyza.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there beautiful people! So, since I won't be able to update until next weekend I thought I should deliver you guys a longer chapter. 
> 
> And I might have done some references from 'Saturn' by Sleeping at Last. Can you blame me, though?
> 
> Hope you like it!

Elyza opened her eyes slowly. Her vision was slightly blurred, but she could feel something was off. She felt comfortable and clean. The blonde sat down slowly, her whole body aching and her skin bruised by sun burns. Wearing nothing but her boxers and an oversized t-shirt that wasn’t hers, Elyza looked around. The bed underneath her was soft, the walls were made of some sort of fancy wood and even thought the room was small, it was comfortable. Well, more comfortable than a speedboat. 

But what caught Elyza’s eyes was the tray on the bed side table in which a bottle of water and a plate with toasts and scrambled eggs were waiting for her. With shaking hands Elyza grabbed the bottle of water and drank it desperately, letting the cold liquid soothe her throat while a few drops that escaped her lips made her t-shit wet. Next, ignoring the cutlery completely, the Aussie started to stuff the toast and eggs inside her mouth. Elyza couldn’t hold in the moan that left her lips. The blonde was so immersed into the food that didn’t realized when the bedroom’s door opened.

“I take you liked my culinary skills.” 

Alicia laughed when the startled blonde looked up from her plate, cheeks filled with food like a hamster. Elyza stared at her scared at first, but then realization finally hit her.

“Alicia?” Elyza said with her mouth full. Alicia nodded and before she could argue with Elyza about the fact that she should stay in bed and rest, she felt the Australian’s arms wrapping around her tightly. Alicia hugged her back, taking in every single aspect of the blonde. “Thank you.” Elyza whispered into Alicia’s hair.

“You don’t have to thank me.” Alicia smiled, stepping away and staring into Elyza’s blue eyes. “I’m glad you’re fine. I thought you had…” The teenager couldn’t manage to get the words out. “You said you had one last bullet and…”

“I couldn’t do it.” Elyza mumbled. “I couldn’t pull the trigger.”

“I’m glad you didn’t.” Their moment was interrupted by Elyza’s growling stomach. Alicia laughed and let go of the blonde in front of her. “I think someone is hungry.”

“You think?” Elyza smirked, sitting back in her bed and proceeding to eat the breakfast food. “Just so you know, I’ll need much more than toast and some scrambled eggs.” 

“I’ll see what I can get you. Almost everyone has been a pain in the ass about you getting on board.” 

Alicia sat on the bed next to where Elyza was and watched the blonde eat with amusement. The blonde would stuff food inside her mouth until there was no room left and wash it down with a sip of water. 

“I think we will need to talk about that later cause I’m not eating like this just cause I haven’t eaten in weeks.” Elyza stated with her mouth full and Alicia almost didn’t catch her words. “I eat like this on a daily basis, love. When I’m not hungry, I’m horny.”

Alicia felt her cheeks getting hot. She would need to learn how to control her reactions to Elyza’s words now that the blonde could actually see her. She didn’t know Elyza that well, but she knew enough to be sure that her blushing to those words would not go unnoticed. 

“Lucky me there’s a hot brunette to help me with the horny part, right?” Elyza looked at Alicia with a smirk and licked her lips softly.

Alicia shook her head and stood up quickly, trying to ignore the redness in her cheeks. 

“Hum… So… When you finish eating I’ll be outside waiting for you. I’ll introduce you to the others.” The teenager said nervously, living Elyza all by herself again.

“Nailed it.” Elyza said to herself with a smirk and threw one more piece of toast inside her mouth.

The introducing went bad to say the least. First of all Elyza still wasn’t wearing any pants we she went outside, getting a judging glare from Madison and a thirsty look from both Chris and Nick. Alicia could swear that even Strand smirked a bit when the blonde showed up in nothing but boxers and a t-shirt. 

After Alicia introduced everyone and explained how she already knew Elyza the lectures started. Madison and Travis repeated over and over how dangerous her actions were, from talking to Elyza to jumping into the speedboat with Chris and going to check on Elyza by their selves, not knowing if she was alive or had become a walker already. Nick bragged about the fact that he tried to stop his sister, but was greeted by another lecture about he should have told the adults.

Strand took his turn talking about how he wouldn’t change his plan of going to Mexico because of a new add to their group. Daniel rambled about how they couldn’t afford to feed one more mouth given the fact that the food was starting to run low already. Chris screamed about how he needed to help and how important that was while Ofelia just stared at everything.

“Want some?” Elyza sat next to Ofelia and offered her a bag of chips she had found in the kitchen. Ofelia shook her head and the blonde shrugged, going back to eating the chips and watching the family feud with amusement. “This is better than Australian television. You guys wouldn’t happen to have some Vegemite, right?” Ofelia shook her head again and looked down. “Do you ever speak, woman?”

“Only when I actually have something to say.” Ofelia finally voiced her thoughts.

“We are very different, you and I. I like it.”

Elyza turned her attention back to the endless discussion. At that point she wasn’t even listening to what was happening. Elyza only had eyes to an angry looking Alicia and her soft looking and full lips. The blonde smirked, not being able to ignore how unfairly hot the brunette looked while shouting in anger.

“We would need to go to a supply run sooner or later.” Travis said calmly, trying to ease the mood. “Elyza just lead us to face the problem before we imagined.”

“We will be putting ourselves at risk before it would be necessary.” Strand stared at the blonde once again and turned back to Travis. “There are supplies in Mexico. If it wasn’t for her we would have enough until we got there.”

“Blaming Elyza is a waste of time.” Alicia rolled her eyes. “Since going after food is the only thing we can do, we should be focusing on that, not on who will take the blame.”

“I’m with Alicia.” Nick nodded. “Daniel can keep on fishing, but we need other stuff. We can’t eat eel forever.”

“We should separate in groups. Some go to land and the other’ stay on the boat just in case.” Daniel spoke up. “I can go to land. I’m the only one with a gun after all.”

“I’m not leaving my boat.” 

“No shit.” Alicia rolled her eyes at Strand’s words. “I’m going too.”

“No, you’re not.” Madison interfered. “You’re staying in the boat with Chris and Ofelia.”

“No, I’m going!” The teenager argued. “I’m not staying here. I brought Elyza in, she’s my responsibility!”

“I’m her responsibility.” Elyza smirked, nudging Ofelia. 

“That’s why you are staying in the boat with her!”

“Like hell I am! You can’t stop me!”

“Yes I can, Alicia. I am your mother and you’re still underage so you’ll do whatever the hell I say!”

“WHAT?” Elyza suddenly shouted, her eyes wide and mouth hanging open. The blonde only realized how loud she had spoken when all the heads turned to her. “Sorry, I’m still a little crazy from the dehidration. Keep going.” The discussion got back on its track quickly and Elyza turned to Ofelia. “Alicia is underage?”

“She’s seventeen.” Ofelia answered, staring at Elyza with confusion.

“Seventeen? Are you sure?” Ofelia nodded and Elyza placed her head between her hands. “I think I’ve never been cock blocked so hard in my whole life.” The Salvadoran woman stared at Elyza with her eyebrows furrowed. Had she heard right? “Do you happen to know when her birthday is?”

“Alicia is straight.” Ofelia stated, making Elyza laugh.

“Yeah, right. And my mom is a kangaroo.” Elyza stood up and stretched before getting closer to the discussing group. “Hey, I can go to a supply run since I’m the reason you guys are going to land. I need to grab a few things anyway.”

“You need to rest, Elyza.” Alicia said softly, making the Australian smile with the younger girl's concern. 

“I’m fine, Leeshy-Loo. Just give me two days and I’ll be brand new.”

“Leeshy-Loo?” Nick laughed loudly and both Elyza and Alicia glared at the boy who stopped laughing as soon as he realized their eyes burning holes into him.

“Are you sure?” The brunette asked. Alicia couldn’t risk losing Elyza. They had just found each other.

“I have the guns and the skills, love.” Elyza smirked, getting lost in Alicia’s green eyes. Why did she have to be underage?! “Don’t worry.”

“All set up, then. Strand, Alicia, Chris and Ofelia will stay on the boat and the others will got to land after supplies in two days.” Travis gave the final words. 

“Sounds like a plan, mate!” Elyza smiled, but no one smiled back as they got back to their business. “Why does it feel like they hate me?”

“They just need to get to know you better.” Alicia smiled and licked her lips. Elyza had already noticed that the brunette did that a lot, which made only harder for her to keep it in her pants. Seventeen? Really?

“I don’t think they’re willing to. But I don’t really care. The only one who matters to me is you and last time I checked you didn’t hate me, so I’m cool.” 

“Yeah.” Alicia smiled brightly. “We’re cool.”

 

Alicia woke up in the middle of the night to find the bed next to her empty. She would be lying if she said she didn’t freaked out a little before remembering they were in the middle of the ocean and there was nowhere to go. 

Rolling herself around a blanket, Alicia went outside looking for her roommate. The cold night air hit the girl’s face as she walked to the back of the boat, spotting Elyza sitting in one of the couches, staring at the sky as the moon illuminated her face, making her blonde hair look almost silver.

Alicia would never say that out loud, but she had to agree with Elyza’s words back when they were describing each other. The Australian was breathtaking. 

“Aren’t you cold?” Alicia asked, realizing Elyza was wearing her boxers and a white tank top.

“Burrito Alicia!” Elyza smiled widely looking at the girl all rolled up in her blanket. “No, I’m fine.”

“Really? Cause your nipples say otherwise.” 

“Ok, maybe I’m a little cold.” Elyza smirked. Alicia sat next to the blonde and opened her arms so Elyza could get inside her warm cocoon. “Thanks.”

They stayed in silence for a while, enjoying each other’s company and Alicia couldn’t stop but thinking how much better it was to enjoy the silence with someone in person and not over the radio. The younger girl stared at the star gazing Australian and smiled lightly. She loved talking to Elyza, but she found a weird sense of peace by just looking at her like that. Her blue eyes shining along with the stars, filled with warmth and looking more beautiful than the sky above then. In that moment Alicia thought that the universe was made just to be seen by those eyes.

“Isn’t it crazy?” Elyza finally broke the silence with a soft voice. There was no smirk or flirtation, just truth, peace and innocence. “One day everything was fine and then everything ended. It’s like we forced nature so much that it got tired and decided to show that her power is so much bigger than us to a point of denying the human being biggest fear: death itself.” Elyza tore her eyes away from the sky and looked at Alicia. The blonde could swear that her heart would skip a beat every time she looked at teenager. “It just shows how rare and beautiful is that we exist. We are such small and fragile things.”

“That thing you told me in the radio, that I made you feel complete. Was that true?” Alicia said just above a whisper, scared that if she spoke too loud she would wake up and that moment would slip away through her fingers.

Elyza smiled so big that Alicia couldn’t help but smile too.

“Yes, it’s true. I don’t know why or how, but you managed to fill the hole that I have felt inside for as long as I can remember. I did everything you can possibly imagine to get rid of it.” Elyza took a deep breath. She was never the one to talk about feelings or have serious conversations. “I went to see doctors who only gave me some pills for depression. I tried to focus on my art to let the emotions out. I tried every single drug, would go out for parties and stay away from home for days. I would even have sex with random people just trying to feel something, but nothing worked. And then, when I had given up you came into the picture and just the sound of your voice was enough. How crazy is that?”

“Pretty crazy.” It was all Alicia managed to say. She didn’t know what to say, but she definitely was feeling something going around in the pit of her stomach. 

“You saved me in more ways than one, Leeshy-Loo.” Elyza nudged Alicia’s side. “I wish my mom could meet you. She would love you for stopping me from doing stupid things. It’s rushed, but I also don’t meet the parents before the fifth date and since I already meet Madison, it’s only fair.”

Alicia smiled, glad that it was dark enough for Elyza not to see her cheeks growing red.

“Tell me about your family.” The brunette suggested, realizing how Elyza’ smile grew wider when she talked about her mother.

“My mom is a surgeon. Seeing her work and how much she helped people lead me to med school. I’ve always admired her.” Elyza smiled, looking into the horizon, lost in her memories as her mind rushed all the way back to Australia. “My dad was from the army. From surviving and shooting a gun to defending myself with my bare hands, he taught me everything I know and I don’t think I would be alive right now if it wasn’t for him. And there is my little brother, Aden. He is a pain in the ass, but I love him to death. I would go to hell and back for him.”

“They sound like great people.” Alicia smiled, getting closer to Elyza. She could feel that the blonde’ skin had finally gotten warmer. 

“They are.” Elyza’ smile dropped a little, realization finally hitting her as she looked back at Alicia. “I hope they’re still alive.”

“I’m sure they’re fine.” Alicia reached for Elyza’s hand underneath the blanket and laced their finger together. “As you said, your dad taught you everything. If you’re alive thanks to his teachings, I’m sure your family is alive as well.”

“He would be so ashamed of me going into the ocean with an engine-less speedboat and with no food whatsoever.” Elyza laughed softly, caressing the back of Alicia’s hand with her thumb. “He was the reason I couldn’t pull the trigger. I could almost see him in front of me saying ‘you can never give up. Just keep fighting no matter what. You can be the strongest of them all; you just need to be brave enough to try’.”

Alicia didn’t know what to say once again. Elyza could make her speechless so easily that it bothered her to no end, but instead of rolling her eyes once again the teenager leaned her head against Elyza’s shoulder and closed her eyes, breathing into the fresh cold air as the Australian’s hand kept caressing hers until she drift back to sleep more comfortable in Elyza’s arms than she would ever be in her bed.

 

The two days Elyza asked to rest before their supply run passed way too quickly for Alicia’s liking. She was worried about the blonde, she wouldn’t lie about it. As much as the teenager trusted Elyza’ skills’, going on shore was always dangerous. Alicia would feel better if she could go as well and keep an eye out for Elyza. It wasn’t like she would be able to kill someone to protect the blonde, but she would feel calmer about being with her.

“Now you butter the fuck out of it.” Elyza explained, teaching Alicia how to eat Vegemite. It turned out they did have some of it in the boat and the Australian couldn’t feel happier. It was good to have a little taste from back home. “C’mon, Leeshy. Marlon Brando the shit out of that toast.”

“Aah! Come on Elyza!” Alicia whined, dropping the knife to the side with disgust. “Now I’ll remember about anal sex every time I eat breakfast.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Elyza smirked.

“Elyza, we’re leaving.” Travis called from the outside.

“I guess that’s my cue.” Elyza took a bite out of her toast and stood up. “Any requests, princess?”

“Don’t die.” Alicia pulled Elyza into a tight hug.

“That I can do.”

Elyza sat on the speedboat, checking the bullets in her faithful 9mm, testing the blade from a machete she found in the boat with her thumb while whistling the Twilight Zone theme song. She looked calm and that annoyed Madison to no end. 

Alicia’s mother wasn’t the Australian biggest fan from the beginning. She was willing to help as much people as she could, but she couldn’t deny that Alicia had put herself and the others in danger not only by talking to the stranger through the radio but also going after Elyza in a speedboat not knowing if she was alive or just another walker.

Yes, Madison was over protective when it came to Alicia and Nick. She would do everything under her reach to keep them safe and Elyza’s presence was making things harder. Their need to go for a supply run because of the girl’s endless hunger proved that. Madison would never admit that out loud, but catching Elyza and Alicia sleeping together at the deck’s couch was also a reason for her annoyance. 

The speedboat stopped at the shore, but no one moved. Elyza looked around, glad that there weren’t any walkers around and amused by everyone’s faces.

“You guys have no idea what you’re doing, right?” The younger blonde smirked and the other’s looked down in shame. “I don’t blame you. Here’s the thing: Big stores are probably empty already. Our best shot at supplies are in abandoned houses. A lot of people ran away and left everything behind.” Elyza explained calmly. “Don’t use fire guns. The noise attracts them. Use pipes, crowbars, baseball bats, knifes. Whatever you can find and aim at the head.” The Australian stepped out of the boat and the other’s followed her lead. “Knock on the door before walking in. That way the walkers will come out after the noise and you can take them out before walking in. It prevents from unnecessary and dangerous surprises.”

“You know a lot about this kind of stuff.” Daniel said with a smile. He liked people with attitude. 

“I used to watch a lot of zombie movies.” The girl smirked once again and started walking into the beach houses direction. “We’ll be splitting up. That way we’ll be able to cover a bigger area. Nick and Daniel go south, while Madison and Travis go north. I’ll go straight into the city. There are more walkers in there, but that means that aren’t survivors, therefore more supplies.”

“It’s too dangerous.” Travis shook his head. “We should stay away from the city and you shouldn’t go alone.”

“Some of us weren’t living in a nice and cozy military neighborhood, Travis. I know my way around and I can take care of myself.”

“What if something happens?” Nick’s eyes were wide open as he was clearly scared.

“Then it happened.” Elyza shrugged. “We’ll meet back here in four hours. Good luck, mates.”

Elyza was way too familiar with all of that. Walking into random houses or establishments and stealing everything she could possibly carry. The walkers weren’t a problem when they were in small numbers. The blonde would just hide behind cars and run her way around, sticking her machete in someone’s head now and then. It wasn’t hard for her. It’s not like they were fast or something. But that was her, the girl who grew up with a military dad and a weird obsession with horror movies.

She actually enjoyed going for supply runs. She liked stealing things and sometimes even trashing some houses just for the fun of it. Sometimes Elyza would find really interesting things around, from pot to a vibrator or from a ukulele to ammo for her gun. 

‘I should bring Alicia with me someday’, Elyza thought. Then again, it seemed like the brunette was the only thing in her mind lately. Alicia being underage wasn’t a problem anymore for Elyza. Not that she would do anything while the teenager didn’t turned eighteen, but she had come to terms with herself after that night when Alicia fell asleep on her shoulder while holding her hand. She was worth the wait. Elyza would spend her whole life waiting for Alicia if that was the case.

Elyza’s backpack was already filled within three hours. She had found a ukulele, ammo, a few clothes, some canned food, protein bars, cereal, cigarettes, a scented candle, tampons and a bottle of Jack Daniels. The Australian was about to leave when she spotted a high school in the distance and smirked. That would be interesting.

 

“Elyza should be back already.” Nick mumbled, already sitting in the speedboat. “What if she was bitten?”

“I don’t think that’s the case.” Daniel answered with a strong accent. “She sounded sure about what she was doing.”

“We’ve been waiting for half an hour already. We should go.” Madison stepped into the speedboat.

“You’re aware that Alicia would hate you forever for leaving Elyza behind, right?” Nick rolled his eyes. His mom could be a little insensitive sometimes.

“We can’t risk ourselves, Nick. She told us to be here in four hours and yet she disappeared.” Madison explained as Travis stepped into the speedboat too. Daniel was the only one still on shore. “Maybe she just used us to get back to land and left us here.”

“I doubt that.” Nick mumbled. He wasn’t blind. He had realized how close Elyza had become to his younger sister. The blonde didn’t looked like the type of person who would let anyone behind.

“RUN!” Elyza’s voice got to them before the girl herself. “LET’S GE THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!”

When Elyza finally appeared into their field of vision, everyone’s jaw fell to the floor with the sight. The blonde was carrying a backpack and two gym bags, running into their direction as fast and they thought it was possible while carrying so much stuff. Behind Elyza, a horde of more than fifty walkers followed her hungrily.

They all jumped into the speedboat with their bags and Daniel started to speed back to Strand’s boat right when the first walked hit the water. Elyza was lying over the bags she was carrying, trying to catch her breath when the blonde started to laugh loudly.

“That was bloody awesome!” Everyone stared at Elyza like she was completely insane. “Did you guys see how many of them there were?”

“You could have died and you’re laughing?” Madison raised her voice, annoyed by the girl’s actions once again.

“But I didn’t and it was totally worth it.” Elyza sat up and opened one of the gym bags filled with canned food. Everyone's eyes went wide. Only one of those bags carried more food than the four of them managed to reap. “I found a school, but it turned out there was a football game going on when the disease started to spread so there were a lot of walkers in there.”

“How did you… This is…” Travis smiled, grabbing the cans into his hands and checking the validation date. Those things could last forever. 

“You’re looking at Elyza Lex, mate. Zombie apocalypse lesbian queen.”

 

Alicia couldn’t hold in the smile that formed in her lips when she spotted the speedboat coming back with everyone in it. She ran into Elyza and hugged her tight. Alicia could see her mother’s disapproving glare, but she didn’t cared. She was glad Elyza was alive. She was glad everyone was alive.

“I got you a gift, princess.” Elyza smiled, opening her backpack and sticking her hand into it. 

Alicia squeaked in excitement when she saw what it was and grabbed it from Elyza’s hands.

“A scented candle!” The younger girl smiled while taking in the delicious lavender smell. “How did you know I love candles? Did Nick tell you?”

“Nope. I just had a feeling you would like it.” Elyza smiled, taking in how happy Alicia was. She lived for Alicia’ smile. 

“Have we met in another life, Ms. Lex?” Alicia said jokingly.

“Who knows, princess…? Who knows?”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My life is a literal mess right now and this is just a filler chapter so you won't espend another week without updates.
> 
> I'll try to write more and update before the weekend, but I can't promise.
> 
> I'm really sorry and I hope you like it.

Elyza was making Alicia feel things… Things she had never felt before, especially about another girl. She though the Australian was beautiful from day one and to Alicia that was normal, she wasn’t blind and would recognize a beautiful person when she saw one, but with Elyza things were different. It wasn’t just about the blonde’s breath taking beauty, it was about the pull Alicia felt towards Elyza, the endless desire of touching her whenever she had the chance.

It had started about a week after Elyza had given her the scented candle. Alicia had fallen asleep earlier than usual, therefore she ended up waking up before everyone else, Elyza included. The brunette rubbed her eyes lazily and looked to the bed on her left where Elyza was still asleep. Alicia stared for minutes at the blonde laying on her stomach next to her. The messy blonde hair spread all over Elyza’s face and pillow and the cute way her mouth hanged slightly open. 

Alicia’ smile turned into lip bite when she started to look at other parts of her roommate’s body. The firm and round ass covered by blue lacy panties, the way her shirt rose slightly revealing her hipbones. Alicia was almost sure that Elyza was sleeping braless and wearing nothing but a dangerously oversized stringer tank top on purpose when the blonde turned to her side and the shirt’s looseness revealed a hard pierced nipple.

The teenager stared once again, completely lost in her thoughts. It was only when she felt the heat on her lowed belly that Alicia snapped out of it and ran outside just like a demon would run away from a cross. She leaned against her bedroom door and took a deep breath. She was straight and has been since she learned what it meant. Alicia never had sex with anyone but Matt and she barely kissed anyone else but him. She had already experienced kissing a girl and it wasn’t her thing, so why would she be felling those things.  
Alicia pulled herself together, blaming it on Elyza’s constant flirting and walked to the bathroom. She needed a shower. A long and cold shower.

Days passed by and Elyza wasn’t making things easier. The flirting kept going and Alicia caught herself waking up earlier everyday just so she could stare at the Australian for a few minutes before she had to leave the room for her own good, but things started to get even more confusing when Elyza decided it was a good idea to sunbath in nothing but her underwear on the boat’s deck.

“Enjoying yourself?” Alicia smiled, sitting on the deck’s railing next to the sun lounger where Elyza was laying down. The brunette swallowed hard while looking down at Elyza’s toned abs and tights. 

“I sure am, love.” Elyza smirked and pulled the aviator glasses up, allowing Alicia to look into the deep blue eyes she loved so much. “I know it’s the apocalypse, but I’m on a fine ass yach and I will enjoy it as much as I can.” 

Alicia only mumbled in response and Elyza realized where the younger girl’s eye were focused.

“I know my boobs are incredible, princess, but I don’t want Moma Clark thinking I corrupted her baby girl.”

“I’m not her baby girl.” Alicia mumbled, cheeks red from being caught. 

“What about me?” Elyza sat up straight, giving Alicia a better vision of her cleavage. “Would you be my baby girl?” The Australian growled sexily. 

Alicia tightened her grip on the railing underneath her, knuckles going white and cheeks turning red. Elyza couldn’t stop herself from smiling proudly when she caught Alicia looking at her lips and licking her own. The former med student thought she had enough self-control to keep on flirting with Alicia just for fun until the teenager turned eighteen, but seeing Alicia looking at her with so much need and desire was starting to make her doubt about how long she would be able to wait.

“I… Can… “Alicia stuttered, finally looking up from the blonde and spotting Chris and Nick staring at Elyza almost as hungrily and she was. They realized her death glare and both boys went back on fishing with Daniel. “Can we talk in private?”

“Lead the way, love.” Elyza smiled and stood up, grabbing the t shirt next to her and putting it on.

“Where did you get those glasses?” Alicia tried to lighten the mood once they arrived their bedroom.

“I found them in Strand’s bedroom.” The Australian answered casually, going through her backpack and finally grabbing a bottle of Jack Daniels. “Want some?”

Alicia nodded after thinking for a second. She wasn’t the drinking type, but if she was going to talk to Elyza about everything that she had been felling she would need some alcohol. The teenager wasn’t sure about what was going on with her, but she definitely couldn’t talk about it with her mom or any of the boys. Whatever that was, Elyza had been through it and could help her understand better than anyone else.

“What were you doing in Strand’s bedroom?” Alicia sat on the floor, her back against the door and Elyza sat in front of her. The younger girl breathing more calmly now that her roommate was fully clothed. 

“Looking for sunglasses.” Elyza smirked and took a long sip straight from the bottle before passing it to Alicia. “What do you want to talk about?” 

The smirk on Elyza’s lips was replaced by a worried look. Alicia felt her heart fluttering in her chest. That was why she needed Elyza so much. It wasn’t just because of her body, it was because how gentle and protective the blonde could be. 

“Please don’t laugh, but I’ve been feeling those things lately… “Alicia took a long sip of Jack Daniels, looking for some liquid courage. She scrunched her nose and looked at Elyza’s curious yet soft eyes. “I’ve been feeling those things about you lately and I’m not going to lie, Elyza, I’m scared. I’ve never felt this way about girls. It’s like you appeared and everything I thought I knew about myself just became this huge lie.”

Elyza stared at the girl in front of her, her head in a mixture of happiness and regret. Alicia liked her the same way she liked the teenager and she couldn’t feel happier about it. It was like a green sign for her to make her move as soon as Alicia turned eighteen, but at the same time she felt like an asshole. Elyza knew how hard it was to discover your own sexuality and accept it and even thought the final destination was incredible, the road could be really rough.

“I’m not gay.” Alicia mumbled, drinking once again. “But when you’re around it’s like I can’t hold myself.”

“Gay and straight aren’t the only sexualities out there, Leeshy.” Elyza said with a serious face. Alicia had to admit she was surprised by how mature Elyza was acting. She was honestly expecting never ending teasing and more flirting. “There’s Bi and Pan.”

“Pan?” Alicia passed the bottle back to Elyza, already feeling way too tipsy.

“It means you don’t care about gender, you only care about the person and how you feel about them.”

“Sounds interesting.” Alicia smiled lightly. 

“But listen, Leeshy. You don’t have to label yourself if you don’t feel like it.” The Australian explained. “I chose to label myself because I identify as a lesbian, but you don’t have to if you don’t want to. You can as well just live and enjoy it without worrying. Experiment and see what fits you. If in the future you feel like labeling yourself you can do it however you feel like it.” Elyza got closer to Alicia, the personal space being completely ignored. “Don’t worry about explaining yourself to people, just worry about explaining it to yourself. You don’t own shit to the world. As long as you’re happy, fuck them.”

Alicia smiled and leaned her forehead against Elyza’s, the alcohol getting the best of her. She definitely wasn’t a drinking person. 

“Thanks.” The teenager whispered and bumped her nose against Elyza’ softly. “I hope you’re aware I’ll have a fuck ton of questions.”

“And I’m willing to help you.” Elyza smiled. “With everything, no matter what.”

“You could start right now.” Alicia closed her eyes and leaned in. People shouldn’t let her drink. Ever. 

Elyza stared at Alicia’s full lips and licked her own. She had told herself she would wait, but it was just a kiss, no harm could come out of that. The blonde leaned in slowly so Alicia could stop her if she wanted to, but it seemed like the teenager was one hundred per cent sure. 

Elyza could feel Alicia’s hot breath as they lips were almost touching…

“Alicia! Elyza!”A loud bang on the door made the girls jump away from each other. “We need you on deck! There’s a boat!”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the kind words, they made me smile like a fool. I wish I could hug all of you.
> 
> I guess this is the longest chapter I've ever written. Mostly of the things that will happen from now on aren't canon. I just had this crazy idea and I hope you like it. I'm not thinking too foward into this fic, I'm just kinda rolling with it, so I'm sorry if anything sounds a little out of place, but I guess I managed to make it work.
> 
> Oh and I decided Elyza is 26 years old. Deal with it.
> 
> So here it is...

That would have happened sooner or later. They all hoped it would be later, but when the five men carrying rifles jumped into their boat there was nothing they could do. They were rendered before any of them could think about fighting back. Madison started to think about everything they would loose and how many supply runs they would need to do to get everything back on track, but those thoughts soon disappeared when she realized they would be lucky to be alive afterwards.

“Tie them up and lock them in a room.” The oldest man said. “We’ll take care of them after we grab everything we need.”

Alicia could feel the gun poking her back as they were led to the machine room. The way her hands were tied behind her back was making her shoulders ache and the gag in her mouth making it difficult to breath. Her whole body was shaking and tears were trying to leave her eyes. It was clear that they would all be dead soon. Alicia just hoped she wasn’t the last one. She wouldn’t stand watching her family and friends being executed.

Elyza remained extremely calm which caused a few weird looks by her group. If she let her nerves got the best of her things would be much worse. She had to have a clear mind so she could think properly. Elyza wasn’t the type of person who would just accept that as fate. She would fight, even if she died in the process. She had counted five men. They had rifles, but also looked like they had no idea how they worked. The Australian also spotted knifes on their boots and two of them also had pistols in their belts. 

As soon as the men left them alone in the machine room Elyza started to try and untie her hands. She needed to come up with plan soon not only because she wanted to live, but also because Alicia’s scared look was breaking her completely. Alicia had saved Elyza from death and from herself. The blonde was willing to go full commando on those heavily armed men if it meant to protect Alicia.

After ten minutes Elyza had managed to loosen the ropes a little bit, but there was only one way to get rid of those things and she wasn’t exactly willing to do it until the door opened once again and the bald man was back. 

“Which one of you ladies will entertain us before we kill everyone?” The man smirked.

The look of pure horror in Alicia’s eyes was the encouragement Elyza needed to keep going. Taking a deep breath the Australian held onto her own thumb and dislocated it with a crack. Luckily the man was distracted enough with Ofelia to notice Elyza’s wince of pain.

“You look like you would be too gentle in bed. I need a fierce woman.” He said to Ofelia and Elyza felt her breakfast coming back up from her stomach. “You’re hot, but too old for me, darling.” If they weren’t under those circumstances, Madison would have rolled her eyes. Elyza could see from where Alicia had pulled her beauty from. 

The man turned around to Elyza and the blonde tried to look as sexy as she could. If he didn’t choose her he would most definitely go for Alicia.

“You have incredible boobs, honey. But you look like the kind of girl who would cause too much trouble.” He smirked once again and turned toward Alicia. “This leads us to you, pretty girl.” 

Elyza felt the anger boiling inside her when the man caressed Alicia’s face. “How old are you? Sixteen? This should be…”

His sentence was interrupted by Elyza’s body colliding against the man’s, pushing him hard against the wall. The man tried to grab the pistol from his belt, but Elyza was faster and head-butted him with all of her strength, followed by a knee to the crotch.

The man fell on his knees and Elyza kneeled him in the head. Her anger and need to save Alicia were so big she completely forgot to release her hands and only had her head and legs to fight against him. Elyza could hear her dad’s voice talking about how reckless she was when she would let herself get lead by her anger. Yes, Elyza had a lot of anger issues, but they could be really useful sometimes.

Alicia stared wide eyed as an angry Elyza fought the man with apparent ease. She was aware of Elyza’s strength and skills since her dad was from the military, but Alicia didn’t knew this side of the blonde. The crazy anger that was leading Elyza made Alicia uncomfortable, but it was only until her roommate started to step onto the guy’s face that she started to get scared with that new side of Elyza.

Elyza stared down at the man she just killed with her bare hands in front of everyone as her blood still boiled in her veins. Her combat boots were covered in blood and brains and not even the best surgeon would be able to put his face back together. She wasn’t proud of herself and she was scared of looking around.

The Australian finished releasing her hands and removed her gag before placing her thumb back on its place, her anger still so alive and the adrenaline so strong she didn’t even felt the pain. Elyza grabbed the bald man’s pistol and opened the door.

“I’ll be right back.” She mumbled, not looking Alicia in the eyes before closing the door behind her.

There were gunshots… lots of them and as much as Alicia wanted to feel worried about Elyza she couldn’t stop looking at the corpse in front of her. The blonde had smashed the man’s head by stepping onto it over and over without thinking twice. She felt worried, but also as scared as possible. The person who did that wasn’t Elyza, it couldn’t be.

Alicia used the little movement she had to get away from the body and closer from her mother as the shooting kept on going on the outside. If Elyza failed, they would all die anyways and it would probably be way more violent considering those men would be willing to revenge their dead friend. On the other hand, if her roommate managed to get rid of ‘pirates’ and save her family, Alicia wasn’t sure she would be able to look at Elyza with the same eyes ever again. 

The teenager leaned against her mother and hoped for the chaos to end.

It felt like hours until the door busted open, revealing a tired looking Elyza. The girl used the knife in her hand to free Travis and gave him the blade so he could free the others. Elyza sat on the floor while clutching onto her side and lit a cigarette, the blood in her hands turning the white cylinder red.

Once Alicia was free from the ropes she went to approach her friend, worried about the blood gushing between the fingers that were holding her side tightly, but the curiosity got the best of her. She wanted to go outside… She needed to go outside.

“Don’t.” Elyza mumbled, almost reading Alicia’s mind. “Stay here with me. I could use some help, Leeshy.”

Alicia looked down at the blonde once again. She would come back to help Elyza, she just needed confirmation of what she pretty much already knew had happened. 

“Alicia!” The teenager heard the heavy accented voice calling once she stepped outside.

It looked like a battlefield. Bullet holes decorated the wooden walls and furniture as the blood painted the floor red. Alicia was speechless and not in a good way. Elyza was the responsible for that. The beautiful and goofy girl who she liked so much had just killed five men without even trying to resonate with them. There were no words or pleads, just blood and death. The woman who did that wasn’t the one she met weeks ago on the radio. 

“Alicia.” A whisper took the brunette from her thoughts. Elyza was standing next to her with sad eyes.

“I can’t…” It was all she managed to say before running back to her bedroom.

______________________________________________________________________________

Elyza didn’t forced Alicia to talk to her, but the expectation was killing her slowly. She wasn’t proud of what she had done. It reminded her of the person she was trying to run from, but if Elyza hadn’t killed those men they would all be dead by now. She just wanted to protect everyone and now Alicia couldn’t even look at her for more than a few seconds.

Elyza understood. For years she couldn’t look at herself either.

They managed to clean the boat, all the red had disappeared, but the bullet holes were still in there, remembering everyone of what happened. As if it wasn’t enough, Elyza also had a bullet wound that wouldn’t let her forget about what she had done. She had fought for years trying to ignore that side of her, now everything was rushing right back and something inside Elyza screamed that that wasn’t the end.

“How long do you think she’ll be mad at me?” Elyza mumbled as Ofelia changed the bandages from her wound. She would rather it was Alicia, but she couldn’t exactly chose. Ofelia needed someone to help her with her wounds and Elyza did too. It was some sort of team work.

“I don’t know, Elyza.” Ofelia breathed out. Elyza and she had become closer after the attack. Ofelia was a good listener and she was really wise for her age. She always had some words of advice for the Australian. “Everything that happened was really rough. You saved us and I’m sure she is glad for that, but maybe she just needs some time to let it sink.” The Salvadoran woman cleaned the wound carefully. “Trust me, it’s hard to realize that someone you thought you knew it’s a different person.”

“I’m not a different person.” Elyza mumbled, holding in her emotions.

“For Alicia you are. We never imagine that the people we know are capable of killing. When we were still in land my father tortured one of the soldiers for information. I used to think he was cruel for that, but now I think back and realize that if it wasn’t for him we would probably be dead by now.” Ofelia explained calmly. “Who we are and who we need to be to survive are two different things. Alicia needs time to see that.”

“What if that’s who I actually am?”

“Then she’ll have to learn to like you for who you are.”

“I don’t think that’s possible, Of.”

Elyza moved around her makeshift bed at the engine room. She couldn’t sleep in the same room as Alicia and she wasn’t feeling like being anyone else’s roommate so the Australian stuck with the horrible bed in a noisy room, but that wasn’t the reason she couldn’t sleep.

The way Alicia had been looking at her since the attack was stuck in the back of her head, the scare and disappointment on those green eyes were enough to break Elyza. The blond woman laughed humorless. Years looking for something that could make her feel something and one simple look from that girl that she barely knew could turn her into a mess.

Elyza needed to talk to Alicia or at least try to. She walked to her old bedroom and walked in, not bothering to knock and knowing the door would be open. For some reason Elyza would never understand the doors didn’t have locks, but she was glad for it now.

The Australian sat on her bed, Alicia’s back turned towards her. Elyza looked at the soft brown hair and took a deep breath. She could almost smell Alicia’s sweet perfume. 

“I know you’re awake. Your breath is uneven.” Elyza’s voice was barely above a whisper. “And you never sleep on your side.” _Way to sound like a creep, asshole._

Alicia shifted slightly, but didn’t looked at her.

“I know you hate me right now, but I just wanted to say that I’m sorry.” Alicia hugged her pillow and waited for Elyza to keep talking. “But I’m not sorry for killing those men because if I hadn’t done it we would all be dead. I’m not sorry for the blood in my hands because God knows there’s a lot of it in them and it doesn’t matter how sorry I am I’ll be doomed anyway. But I am sorry for disappointing you. I never wanted to let you down, Leeshy. I just wanted to keep you safe. I just wanted to keep you away from a problem you really don’t need in your life. I bear it so you don’t have to.”

Elyza stood up and looked down at Alicia. The blond smiled at the younger girl’s beauty. Alicia had the most beautiful side profile she had ever seen. Elyza had to draw it as soon as she found some paper and a decent pencil.

“Your mom is going to kill me for this and I can almost see you rolling your eyes when you look at it, but protection is never enough.” Elyza took the artifact from the back of her jeans and placed it on the bedside table. “These are violent times, Leeshy. Back in the day if you didn’t followed the world you would stay behind, but now if you don’t follow it you die. And I don’t want to lose you. I’d rather die than to see you go.”

The Australian opened the door and glanced at Alicia’s body one last time.

“Good night, Leeshy-Loo.”

As soon as she heard the door closing, Alicia turned around and looked at the pistol on her bedside table. The teenager rolled her eyes as tears streamed down her face.

___________________________________________________________________________

“Mom!” Alicia ran through the deck, binoculars in hands.

“I know you’re not running on my deck.” Strand warned, walking around with two fishing rods in hands.

“Jesus! Seriously?” The teenager rolled her eyes.

“What’s wrong? What is it?” Madison asked, reaching up to her daughter.

“Look, over there.” Alicia pointed into the shore, giving her mother the binoculars. “Can you see it? Suitcases. A lot of luggage.” 

“Holy shit. Where did that come from?” 

“We need supplies.” 

“Alicia, no…” Madison said in a warning tone.

“I’ve been watching, there’s no one there. No infected.” The seventeen year old tried to convince her mother. “All that stuff is just lying there.”

“There is infected in the water.”

“We’re not gonna swim.” Alicia said as it was the most obvious thing.

“I’ll go.” Nick mumbled, looking into the binocular he had snatched from his mom.

“I’m with you.” Chris stated.

“Wait…” Madison took a deep breath, trying to calm down.

“If they’re going, I’m going.” Alicia affirmed and Elyza couldn’t help but smile at the girl’s braveness. They haven’t talked yet, but the blonde was always nearby.

“No… Listen to me! All of you! ” Madison raised her voice. “If anything were to happen…”

“Anything did happened.” Alicia cut off her mother. “We’re all in it. We’ve seen and done it, so stop putting us on the kids table.”

“I’ll watch her.” Chris rolled his eyes, trying to _‘be the man’_.

“You’re gonna get slapped.” Alicia threatened, earning a laugh from Elyza. The brunette just glared at the older woman who stopped laughing. 

“Mom, we need more clothes, we need more meds. We need more everything.” Nick reasoned. “So we’ll go while Travis fixes the engine, we get what we can and we get straight back.”

“What’s going on?” Travis walked into the deck.

“We’re going on shore.” Chris said almost proudly.

“Like hell you are.”

“We’re not asking for permission.” Alicia answered, earning a proud smile from Elyza. 

“Excuse me?” Travis glared at his stepdaughter.

“Hold on.” Madison tried to intervene.

“I’ll take them.” Daniel stepped in. “The girl is right, we’re wasting time. If anything goes wrong we come back quickly.”

Madison and Travis looked at each other, still unsure about the idea. They were lacking of supplies and that was a fact, but none of them were willing to rink their kids in order to get clothes and medication. It seemed like it didn’t mattered what they said, the decision was already made and as Alicia had said herself, they were not asking for permission.

“Hey, if you see something that’s not completely awful… Alicia, I can’t do geriatric chic.” Ofelia pleaded as they loaded the speed boat.

“Don’t worry, I got you.” Alicia smiled.

“Elyza…” Madison called the Australian to the side. “Can I have a word?”

Elyza wasn’t going to lie, she was dying to go on shore with the rest of them. She loved going through other people stuff, but she had come into terms that she shouldn’t force being next to Alicia more than she needed to. After that night in which Elyza had opened up to Alicia the blonde tried to crack a joke here and there in an attempt to make things go back to what they were, but Alicia was hard as a stone.

“What’s up?” Elyza furrowed her eyebrows, trying to protect her eyes from the sun.

“Go with them.” Madison pleaded. “If the infected appear…”

“I won’t hesitate to kill them?” Elyza said bitterly.

“You’ll protect them. Especially Alicia.” 

Elyza looked into Madison’s fearful and knowing eyes. Madison wasn’t dumb, she had dealt with teenagers and their emotions and turned it into her job. Elyza could be older, but the she knew that look that took over the Australian’s face whenever Alicia was around. Her suspicious had been confirmed when Elyza attacked a man for only considering touching her daughter in the wrong way.

Madison didn’t trust Elyza and she was sure there was so much more beneath all of that, – maybe a secret or a lie – but she trusted the blonde skills and protectiveness over Alicia.

“Give me a minute; I’ll go grab my stuff.”

That plane crash was a gold mine. Clothes, perfumes, medicine, electronics… Everything. Elyza realized Alicia wasn’t happy to have her there so she just kept her distance, keeping an eye out for the brunette as she did what she loved the most: Going through stranger’ stuff.

Elyza threw everything she judged useful into her backpack, trying some of the clothes now and then. The blonde wore a beanie she found somewhere and looked at Alicia’s direction once again. The younger woman was wearing a flowery robe and a weird looking hat as she looked at Nick and laughed. Elyza smiled sadly, not only missing the times in which that beautiful laugh was sent towards her but also her little brother. She hoped Aden as alive… He had to be alive.

Elyza was so absorbed by Alicia’s smile that she only realized that the infected were everywhere once she heard a gunshot. 

Daniel aimed at the infected and shoot them with precision as the young Asian man who had run down the sand dune towards was hiding behind him breathless. There were too many of them and Daniel soon ran out of bullets. 

The infected started to corner them. Daniel, Alicia, Chris and Elyza positioned themselves. They had no option but to fight.

“Grab something!” Daniel shouted and the teenagers went looking for some sort of weapon. 

Elyza grabbed her machete and started to attack the walkers without a second thought. Alicia managed to grab some sort of metal pipe and started to swing it around, hitting the infected in the head with all of her strength. The adrenaline and fear were so consuming she didn’t even realized she had just killed her first walker… She had just killed someone. 

One after the other, the walkers got closer and closer to them. Elyza was so focused on the infected around her that she didn’t realized that one of them had a firm grip onto Alicia. Their teeth’s were almost sinking into her when a blood covered Nick showed up out of nowhere and killed the threat. 

“We need to run!” Daniel shouted. “Come on!”

The group ran back to the speed boat as Elyza and Nick followed right behind, taking care of any walkers who dared to get too close. 

“Nick! Are you ok?” Alicia asked desperately as they reached the speed boat. “Are you bit?”

“I’m ok.” Nick reassured. Alicia hugged him tightly and Elyza couldn’t help but feel a little jealous. She missed how Alicia cared about her and how she hugged her so tightly and gently at the same time.

“We need to go.” Daniel said, pushing the speed boat into the water.

“Wait!” The Asian boy stopped them. “There is someone else.”

 

“They’re coming back!” Madison shouted while looking through the binocular. The speed boat was grouting a small yellow inflatable boat.

Madison ran down to the speed boat platform and helped everyone with the suitcases, but not before hugging her kids and even Chris. She could not describe how happy she was that everyone was alive and well.

“Who are they?” Madison asked, looking at the Asian boy and the Latina on the yellow boat.

“They were in the crash, mom.” Alicia said still breathless from the adrenaline. “We need to help them.”

“They’re a liability.” Strand said coldly, looking down at them. “The girl is sick. She’ll turn.”

“Fine, fine! They won’t go with us!” Alicia shouted, getting annoyed by Strands lack of compassion. “They just need some medicine and a place to stay for the night! Look at her! She’s dying!”

“There is nothing we can do.” Strand stated once again.

“Wait, hold on!” Madison raised her voice. “We could give them some water and tie their boat to the Abigail and give them a ride until we find land somewhere else.”

“I’m not accepting this.”

“It will be quick, Strand.” Madison pleaded. “Just for a while.”

It wasn’t much, but it was everything they could do. Alicia wasn’t happy about it, but it was better than nothing. The brunette took a few towels, water and food to the inflatable boat and tied it to the Abigail.

“That’s not fair.” Alicia mumbled.

“I’m sorry.” Madison placed an arm around her daughter’ shoulders.

Elyza appeared out of nowhere, throwing her backpack into the inflatable boat and breaking the delicate silence. 

“What are you doing?” Alicia asked with wide eyes.

“Look who’s talking!” Elyza smirked. “I’m staying with them. The girl needs some medical help. I can at least give her that.” Alicia nodded and walked away with Madison right behind her.  
“Okay, so I need names.”

“I’m Monty. Monty Green.” The Asian boy introduced himself as the boat started to move. “And this is Raven Reyes.”

“Awesome. I’m Elyza Lex and I’ll be you doctor in this post apocalyptical paradise.” Elyza smiled. “Now let me see this, Raven.”

“Go ahead, doc.” The Latina groaned as Elyza pushed her t-shirt up to have a better vision of the injure. 

It was bad… Really bad. A piece of metal had gone through the girl’s body until her back. Luckily the piece of metal wasn’t too large, so the internal organs weren’t too compromised, but it had went deep and Elyza hoped it hadn’t gotten anywhere near Raven’s spinal column or things would get bad in the long term.

“Raven honey, good news and bad news. You choose what you want to hear first.”

“Why are we stopping?” Raven said with difficulty.

Elyza looked back at the Abigail, spotting Strand standing at the speed boat platform with a small axe in his hands. The rope that tied the two boats together had been cut.

“Strand!” Elyza screamed angrily. “Strand you son of a bitch! I’ll kill you!”

Alicia heard the screams and ran to the back of the yacht as the yellow little boat became more and more distant. The teenager felt a mixture of anger and despair growing inside her, tuning her limps almost numb. Elyza kept screaming profanities at Strand and Alicia finally snapped out of her trance and ran to her bedroom.

The seventeen year old grabbed the pistol Elyza had given her from her nightstand and ran straight to Strand’s captain cabin. Alicia was aware of how crazy that was. She wasn't planning on hurting the rich man, she just needed to scare him enough for him to stop the boat. Worst case scenario they would all be kicked from the Abigail, but the adrenaline from fighting the walkers was still running in her veins and she was tired of being nothing but a spectator to everything that was happening. 

“Stop the boat, Strand.” Alicia ordered, aiming the gun to the back of the man’s head.

“We are not coming back for your little girlfriend.” Strand smirked while looking into the horizon, clueless of the gun that was being pointed at him.

“I don’t think you understand.” Alicia growled. “Stop. The. Fucking. Boat.” 

“You’re not in char…” Strand’s words disappeared once he saw the gun. “Alicia, drop the weapon.”

“As soon as you stop the boat.” Alicia said angrily. 

“Come on, stop it…” Strand smiled and walked towards Alicia, not believing she was capable of shooting.

Alicia moved the gun a few inches to the side and pulled the trigger. The bullet passed close to Strand’s head and hit the window behind him, making sure he understood she wasn’t bluffing.

“Stop the boat!” Alicia shouted angrily as the rest of the group entered the cabin, startled by the sound.

“Okay, I’ll stop.” Strand said, raising his hands in defeat. 

“What the hell, Alicia?” Madison stood between her daughter and the boat’s captain. “Drop the weapon!”

“I’ll drop it when Elyza and the others are safe in the boat.” Strand tried to use Madison as a distraction to leave the cabin, but the teenager pushed her mother to the side and aimed at the man once again. “Stop it, Strand! Stop it or next time I won’t miss!”

“I’ll go get them.” Nick smiled when the boat came to a full stop. To be honest he was proud of Alicia. Not only she was fighting for what she believed in, but she was starting to take the wheel of her own life. Nick used to think she needed protection, but Alicia was always strong and able to protect herself. In just one day she had killed infected, stood up to their mother and faced Strand, something none of them had the courage to do.

Alicia kept a firm grip on the gun during the whole time. Madison tried to talk her into giving her the weapon, but the brunette’s eyes were glued to Strand. If he so much tried to speed the boat before everyone was safe in it she wouldn’t think twice before pulling the trigger again. 

She understood Elyza now. The anger building up in her chest was leading each and every one of her actions and the fear of losing the Australian was suffocating her to a point she was willing to do everything within her reach to keep Elyza alive and close to her.

The door behind Alicia busted open as an fuming Elyza entered into the room. 

“Elyza, I…” Strand stood up and tried to explain himself, but his words were cut short when Elyza’s fist collided against his face. The captain of the Abigail went to the floor, completely knocked out.

“You son of a bitch!” Elyza shouted at the body on the floor. Alicia threw her arms around Elyza, hugging her tight. “I’m so glad I gave you this gun.”

“You two, on the deck right now!” Madison ordered, kneeling next to Strand.

“Not in the mood for lecture right now, Moma Clark. I have an injured Latina downstairs that will probably get crippled if I don’t help her.” Elyza smirked at Alicia. “But I’m sure Alicia will enjoy it for me.”

“I hate you.” The teenager rolled her eyes.

“You sure do, love.”

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Alicia started to ignore her mother after the fifth time she said that holding a gun to Strand’s head and forcing him to stop the boat was wrong and reckless. Madison went on and on about how that was his ship and that they needed to play by his rules or they would be kicked out and the shore was way more dangerous than the sea. Alicia rolled her eyes and didn’t protest when her mother told her she would be keeping the gun. She knew Elyza could get it back whenever she wanted to. Stealing things without anyone noticing was one of the Australian’s many talents.

The brunette wasn’t sorry about anything, she was just glad that Elyza was safe and happy that they could help Raven and Monty. Alicia cleaned herself up from the infected blood and stayed on the deck for a few hours, watching the night fall before heading inside and stumbling across Elyza.

“Can I walk you to your bedroom?” Elyza smirked and Alicia rolled her eyes.

“How’s Raven?” The teenager asked, knowing Elyza was right behind her.

“The wound will be fine. I cleaned everything and stitched her up and thanks to the antibiotics Nick found the risk of infection is very little, but I still don’t know if she’ll be able to walk again. We’ll have to wait and see. But she is a strong one, everything will be okay.”

“They were lucky we found them.” Alicia smiled and turned around when she reached her bedroom door. 

“It’s not every day that you get rescued by a hot doctor and a breathtaking brunette.” Elyza smirked, leaning against the wall opposite to Alicia.

“I’m sorry.” Alicia mumbled. “Sorry for freaking out about what you did and acting like a little bitch.”

“Yes, you indeed acted like a little bitch.” The teenager smiled and punched Elyza’s shoulder. _She looks cute in a beanie._ Alicia thought. “But I get it. It’s harsh and sometimes we just need space to let it all sink in.”

“Wow, Elyza Lex acting like an actual grown up.”

“Actually, Ofelia told me that. I’m just using her knowledge to look cool and get the girl.”

“You can stop trying to get the girl.” Alicia blushed. “You already got her.”

Alicia stepped closer to Elyza and kissed her softly. The Australian smiled into the kiss and rested her hands on Alicia’s waist, bringing her closer so their bodies were touching completely. Alicia briefly broke the kiss to breath and dived into Elyza’s soft lips once again, deepening the kiss as their tongues caressed each other.

That was way better than the first time Alicia kissed a girl. It wasn’t just a teenager experiment; Alicia wanted that, she needed to feel Elyza against her; she wanted to connect to the blonde completely, emotions, body and soul.

Elyza’s hands explored the brunette’s body as she sucked Alicia’s bottom lip between her own and bit it lightly, being greeted by a soft and beautiful moan from the teenager. She had to be careful not to go too far or she wouldn’t be able to stop, but Alicia’s curious hands caressing the skin just above her waistband were turning rational thinking into something impossible. 

Alicia’s lips left her mouth and started to trail kissed along her jawline and down her throat. Elyza moaned and opened her eyes, spotting an open mouthed Chris in her peripheral vision. The Australian smirked and placed her hands on Alicia’s ass and pulled her up.

“Oh God.” Alicia breathed out, locking her legs around Elyza’s waist and attacking her lips again in a deep and desperate kiss.

Elyza placed her forearm underneath Alicia’s ass to support her weight more easily as she reached the doorknob with the other hand and walked into their room, lips never breaking apart. 

Alicia’s body landed on the bed a little harshly, but she didn’t cared, actually it only turned her on even more. She always liked when things got a little… Rough. Alicia tangled her hands on Elyza’s blond curls and moaned a little too loud when she felt the other girl’s tight pressing against her center. She could feel the wetness between her tights and she was surprised by how easy Elyza managed to do that. They were only kissing and Alicia already felt like this huge horny mess. Alicia remembered how Matt would take a while to make her wet or don’t manage to do it at all. It’s not that sex with Matt was bad; it was just that he wasn’t that good… He wasn’t Elyza.

Alicia’s hands found their way down to Elyza’s breasts and she squeezed them slightly, not exactly sure about what to do with the soft and incredible weight filling her hands, but the groan that left Elyza’s throat told her she was doing the right thing.

“We should stop.” Elyza mumbled, going against all of her instincts.

“I’ll be quiet.” Alicia attacked Elyza’s lips with thirst, buckling her hips up looking for some sort of friction.

Elyza couldn’t help but imagine Alicia biting into her full and swollen lips in a try to keep the moans in as she went down on her. The Australian pushed the thought away and held Alicia’s hands, stopping the delicious massage in her breasts.

“Alicia, stop.” Elyza said more firmly. 

“Am I doing something wrong?” The teenager’s confused look broke Elyza’s heart.

“No, you’re doing incredible. That’s the problem. If we keep going I won’t be able to stop.”

“Then don’t stop.” Alicia kissed the blonde woman above her once again, but Elyza pulled away way too quickly.

“I can’t.” Elyza whined and rolled away from Alicia, lying next to the brunette and staring at the ceiling. “You’re underage.”

“What?” Alicia rolled to her side, staring at Elyza with one eyebrow raised. “Are you serious?” Elyza nodded, pulling off her beanie and throwing it to the floor. “You do realize there are no laws anymore right? You’re not going to jail for having sex with me.”

“I know.” The blonde closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “But it just doesn’t feel right.”

“Elyza…” Alicia placed her weight on her elbow, looking down at the Australian and her swollen lips. “I’m turning eighteen in three months. Do you really want to wait for it in this new reality in which we have no idea if we will be alive tomorrow?”

“When you put it like that it sounds bloody dumb.” Elyza groaned loudly. “But I do want to wait, Leeshy. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t get it, but I respect your decision.” Alicia smiled and lay on her back again. “But just so you know, I’ve never been so horny in my whole life.”

“Way to make it easier, Alicia.” Elyza rolled her eyes. “Chris saw us.”

“What?” Alicia’s eyes went wide. 

“He was outside. That’s why I brought us into the bedroom, but I think the image of us making out is carved into his mind forever.” Elyza turned her head and looked into Alicia’s green eyes. “Do you think he’ll tell anyone? I wouldn’t care, but I imagine you don’t want your mom freaking out.”

“I hope not, but we’re not exactly subtle. Strand called you my girlfriend today.” Alicia couldn’t help but smile at the word. _Elyza’s girlfriend._ She liked the sound of that.

“Strand…” Elyza said with disgust. “I don’t trust him. The man is hiding something.”

“Why would you say that?”

“Did he told any of you were he’s going?” Alicia’s silence was enough answer. “He must have a plan. He can’t wander around the sea forever.”

“I don’t know where he’s going, but I know that after today I might not be welcome there.”

“Speaking of…” Elyza smiled and rolled on her side. “Thanks for that. I keep on thinking that I must protect you, but you’re the one who keeps saving my ass.”

“Well, it is a great ass.”

Elyza smiled and kissed Alicia once again. Just three months.

Three agonizing months.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was hard to leave Alicia’s bed, but she had to. Elyza couldn’t stop thinking about Strand and how she didn’t trust him not even a little. The Australian went to the captain’s cabin and started searching everything that her eyes landed on. It took her a few minutes before she found the hidden chest underneath one of the sofas. 

There were guns, documents and maps showing one single location. Baja, Mexico. 

Elyza sat down, placing her hands on her head and taking a deep breath. It couldn’t be. It was like all of her demons were coming back to haunt her. She needed to know more and if Elyza was right – and she was almost sure she was. – She would have to make a rough decision.

She sat there in the dark, maps scattered on the floor and waited for Strand to show up.

Luckily or not, it didn’t took long until Strand showed up and turned the lights on, jumping slightly from scare. He didn’t expected Elyza to be there and after getting a taste of how strong she could be, he didn’t wanted to mess with the Australian… At least not physically.

“Victor Strand, forty six years old, millionaire.” Elyza said, looking at the man in front of her. “CEO of Abigail Industries, stuck in a boat with a bunch of people he doesn’t give a fuck and heading to Baja, more specifically to the safe haven of Arkadia, a luxury shelter for millionaire assholes like you to hide and keep living peacefully as shit goes down all around the world.”

“How do you know about Arkadia?” Strand smiled, sitting in front of the blonde. He wasn’t worried about Elyza finding out about his plans, but he was more curious than ever about the woman.

“Don’t you feel bad about hiding behind a wall protected by mercenaries while there are people dying on the outside?” Elyza glared at Strand and placed her elbows on her knees, leaning in slightly.

“We do whatever we can to survive.” Strand smirked. “And they are not mercenaries.”

“And I imagine that getting into Arkadia and leaving everyone behind is one of those things.”

“You think like one of us.”

“No, I just met a lot of people that are just like you, Strand. You are all the same, always acting like cold hearted fuckers and thinking about money and power.” Elyza leaned against the sofa, making herself comfortable. “Azgeda it’s a private army who works for whoever pays more. Yes, they are mercenaries.”

“How do you know about all of that, especially about Azgeda?” Strand’s eyes sparkled with curiosity. “Did you lost someone you loved because of them? Since you know about Arkadia it probably happened during the Mount Weather massacre. Was it you family? A girlfriend, maybe? Or were you on the other side of the gun?” Elyza frowned. “There it is! The masks are starting to fall.”

“Alicia and her family were with you from the very start, they saved your life.” Elyza tried to ran away from the subject. “Take them in when we get to Arkadia. The place is big, you won’t even see them again once you’re all in. I’ll take care of Raven and Monty. They’re my responsibility.”

“You are willing to leave Alicia behind?”

“I’m not leaving her behind. I’m staying behind and she’s moving forward. She’ll be safe in Arkadia. That’s the most important.”

“Why do you care about her so much?” Strand stood up and walked to the cupboard underneath the steering wheel. The man grabbed a bottle of whiskey with two cups and sat back down. 

“I just do.” Elyza answered, grabbing the cup Strand offered her and taking a sip.

“What do I get in return?” Strand smirked and crossed his legs.

“Whatever you want.”

“You do know how to deal with people like me.” The captain’ smirk grew wider as he drank the amber liquid from his cup. “I want your secrets. I want to know everything. Especially what you haven’t told Alicia.”

Elyza took a deep breath and emptied her glass. Strand wasn’t trustworthy, but she had to risk it. He was the Clark’s only hope at surviving peacefully.

“Get comfortable. It’s a long story.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alicia is a cute cinnamon roll who likes it rough and no one is convincing me otherwise.
> 
> And what is Elyza' secret? 
> 
> If you feel like talking to me or whatever you can follow me on tumblr: thereckless1611.tumblr.com


	7. Chapter 7

Elyza was determined to wait for three months until Alicia’s birthday. But Alicia herself wasn’t.

Yes, she respected the Australian’s decision, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t try and change her mind. Alicia didn’t cared for the first week, but their make out sessions started to get more and more intense as Elyza learned about Alicia’s body and started to touch her in all the right places.

Alicia was feeling like a horny teenage boy and she hated it, so she used the relative peace they were living to place all of her efforts into seducing Elyza or at least making her so horny there was no turning back. Alicia would walk into their room in nothing but a towel after showering and made sure she eye fucked Elyza or touched her at every chance she got. Since the two girls started to share a bed the teenager made sure she would sleep in almost nothing every night and cuddle the blonde in a way there was no room for a breath between their bodies. 

And for Alicia’s dismay Elyza was holding on like a pro. 

For Elyza’s own dismay she was holding on like a pro. She loved how invested Alicia was into making her lose her cool, that meant extremely hot make out sessions for hours and the sight of a horny Alicia that made her smile widely. And she could not forget about the brunette’s moans. Elyza decided that it was her favorite sound in the world. 

But Alicia had one last trick under her sleeve.

The seventeen year old looked herself in the mirror and her cheeks turned slightly red. Alicia never imagined herself doing all of those things for anyone, especially that. She was self-conscious and usually didn’t liked her own body, but the way Elyza worshiped every inch of her every time they made out gave her a lot of confidence.

Elyza had just finished changing Raven’s bandages when she walked into what she believed it was the most beautiful sight she had ever had in her whole life. Alicia was laying on her bed wearing nothing but red lacy lingerie and the flowery robe she had found in the plane crash. Her hair was loose and her lips were painted with a blood red lipstick.

“Hey there, stranger.” Alicia smirked.

Elyza’s eyes scanned Alicia’s body from head to toe, trying to take in the beauty in front of her eyes. In other times and with someone else she would feel the purest lust, but in that moment while looking at Alicia everything she could feel was admiration. The Australian was amazed by everything Alicia had to offer, not just body but also her soul.

“Can I …” Elyza swallowed hard. “Can I draw you?”

Alicia’ smirk disappeared from her face. She looked for lust and desire in Elyza’s eyes, but all she could see was astonishment. The teenager sat straight, suddenly feeling shy about what she was doing.

“Why?” Alicia closed her robe, hiding her almost naked body.

“Just something to remember.” Elyza mumbled. “Can I?”

The brunette took a deep breath and stared into Elyza’s deep blue eyes. She had posed for Matt before, but never like that in such a vulnerable position. 

“I think so.”

Eliza nodded and smiled weakly, going to her backpack and grabbing the notebook and pencil she had stolen from Strand’s cabin. The blonde sat on her bed and looked at Alicia.

“How do you want me to stand?” Alicia asked, a hand going through her hair shyly. 

“However you feel like it.” 

Alicia moved uncomfortably, shifting around in bed and waiting for Elyza to make some random joke that never came. She decided to sit on her side, upper body sustained by her left arm and legs slightly bent. Alicia’s robe fell open and she threw her hair to the side.

“Is this good?”

“It’s perfect, Leeshy.” Elyza smiled and started to move the pencil. “You’re perfect.”

Alicia blushed and watched Elyza draw. The way the blonde looked at her was just… Overwhelming. She never thought she would see that kind of look in someone’s eyes. When she posed for Matt it was nothing but technical. He would need a model to study some new drawing techniques and Alicia would gladly help him. The boy’s eyes were all concentration and focus on the paper in front of him, but not Elyza. It felt like she was worshiping Alicia every time she would look up from the notebook. Elyza’s look was what Alicia imagine someone would look like after seeing an angel on all its celestial beauty and innocence.

“Thank God there are no icebergs around.” Alicia said, trying to lighten the mood and getting a laugh from Elyza.

“But if we sink you better fit me on the fucking board.” 

“Don’t worry, I won’t let you sink.” 

Elyza smiled and kept on drawing. She was aware that they would be getting to Baja in no time. She just wanted something to remember Alicia as the person who made her feel something other than emptiness and anger.

After half hour Elyza closed the notebook and put it on her side. It was the best draw she had ever done and she didn’t want anyone to look at it, not even Alicia. It was her drawing, her memory, it was how she wanted to remember the brunette. 

Alicia sat straight, legs hanging from her bed and Elyza got closer do her, kneeling between her legs. The blonde placed her hand on the teenager’s cheek softly and caressed it, the awe never leaving her ocean eyes. Elyza stared at Alicia in silence for a few seconds. She couldn’t get enough of the girl. From all the drugs she had already taken, Alicia was the most addicting.

“Can you promise me something?” Elyza said only above a whisper. 

“Anything.” Alicia answered without thinking twice.

“Don’t ever change who you are, Alicia.” The blonde’s voice got caught in her throat and for one second Alicia thought Elyza would cry. “Don’t let the things you need to do to survive get the best of you. Always remember your true, caring and kind self. You are the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, Leeshy. Inside and out. And don’t ever forget that I would do anything for you. Anything to keep you safe.”

Alicia’s heart skipped a beat as she listened to Elyza’s words, not only because it was the most beautiful thing anyone had ever told her, but also because it sounded like goodbye and she couldn’t imagine a life without Elyza, not anymore.

“Okay.” The teenager mumbled.

“Promise, Alicia.”

“Okay, I promise.”

Elyza got closer and kissed Alicia’s lips tenderly. It was nothing like their previous kisses. It was calm and soft and there wasn’t a single hint of lust in it. The Australian placed her arms around Alicia’s hips and slid her to the bed’s edge and onto her lap. Alicia broke the kiss for a brief moment and looked at Elyza’s lipstick smeared lips before kissing the blonde once again. 

Just like her words, Elyza’s lips also tasted like goodbye.

“I don’t want to wait anymore, Leesh.” Elyza whispered, sliding Alicia’s robe down her arms.

And even though those were the words Alicia had waited so eagerly to hear, in that moment she couldn’t care less. The woman in front of her was the only thing that mattered.

Alicia pulled the Australian’s t shirt over her head and looked down at her chest. Following her instincts, the teenager cupped Elyza’s breasts over her bra and massaged them softly, earning a moan from the blonde. Elyza’s hands travelled upwards, caressing every inch of Alicia’s body. Reaching for Alicia’s bra clasp as she freed the brunette’s breasts from its prison.

Elyza looked down at the half naked beauty in front of her and pulled Alicia’s body closer, kissing down the brunette’s throat while her left hand played with one of the girl’s nipples. Alicia had never felt so good in her entire life. The wait was over and she didn’t regret one single bit. The lust in their making out sessions were mind blowing, but the love Elyza was showing Alicia was beyond that world.

“Gross.” At the sound of the voice both girls pulled away startled. Alicia pulled her robe up, covering her body as Elyza just stared at Nick with an angry expression. Again, she would never understand why the boat's doors didn’t had locks. “But it was about time.”

“What do you want, Nick?” Alicia asked, annoyed by her brother’s interruption.

“We’re going to land. Strand said we’re in Mexico.”

“Mexico?”

“We’ll be in the deck in five minutes.” Elyza answered, grabbing her t shirt and standing up.

Both girls packed their bags quickly and Alicia couldn’t get past the cold look on Elyza’s face. The blonde had gone from completely love-struck to no expression at all. The way Elyza was acting bothered Alicia to no end, but they didn’t have the time to talk about it, so they grabbed their backpacks and after Elyza pulled Alicia into a long and tight hug they headed outside, straight into the unknown.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

It looked like a bigger and more fortified version of their neighborhood after the military’s arrival. Alicia couldn’t see what was on the inside, but the incredibly tall and thick walls told her that it was safe on the inside and she couldn’t feel more relieved. Alicia could use some time without worrying about dying.

The group stopped in front of the steel gate and looked around. They didn’t know what that was or if they could just walk in, but they had high hopes. That was the new beginning Madison wanted so much. They watched as Strand placed his hand on a small screen next to the gate.

Alicia felt Elyza’s pinky finger interlacing with her own. The brunette looked at the girl next to her. Elyza had a hoodie under her leather jacket. Its hood was covering her head and the blonde looked down, almost as she was trying to hide her face from someone.

“Identification.” A small electronic voice came out of the small screen.

“Victor Strand, CEO of Abigail Industries. Code Abigail. Number 1845.” Strand replied almost proudly.

“Guests.” The voice asked once again after a moment of silence.

Strand looked back at Elyza and smirked.

“None.”

Elyza’s head shot upwards, anger plastered across her face as the gate opened just enough for Strand to walk in.

She should have known better. Elyza was naïve for thinking she could trust Strand. He was selfish just like every other big fish out there. They were stuck.

“Son of a bitch!” Elyza screamed, running into the gate and kicking it. 

They looked at each other, sad and confused. The man they saved had just left them to burn with the whole world as he was safe and sound behind walls.

“What about now?” Nick mumbled. Madison was sitting on the floor, hands tangled in her hair as Travis scratched his head, trying to think. 

“We could go back to the boat.” Ofelia suggested.

“Not enough gas.” Raven answered. “If we go back we will be stuck in the middle of the ocean.” 

“We could ask them for some fuel.” The Salvadoran woman tried once again and Elyza laughed at how naïve Ofelia could be.

“I don’t think it’s going to happen.” Daniel said with his thick accent.

Elyza pressed her forehead against the gate’s cool metal, ignoring the conversation behind her. She had also been naïve; first for trusting Strand and second for believing she would be able to run away from her past. Everything was rushing back and if she wanted to keep Alicia and her family safe she would have to face her demons, even if it meant disappointing the brunette and losing her trust and friendship. Maybe that was her forgiveness. Sacrificing what she cared about to save others, letting go of her old selfish self and doing something good.

Not putting more thinking into it Elyza placed her hand on the small screen, hoping her name was still on the data bank.

“Identification.” The voice came back and everyone shot their heads to the direction of the sound. It was now or never. The secret would be out and Elyza was sure Alicia would hate her forever.

“Elyzabeth Alexandria Griffin, Azgeda Private Army. Code Wanheda. Number 308.” Elyza answered, scared of looking back into the confused and judging eyes of her people.

“Guests.”

“Nine guests to be checked in under the responsibility of Azgeda. Alicia, Madison and Nick Clark. Travis and Chris Manawa. Ofelia and Daniel Salazar. Raven Reyes and Monty Green.”

The gate opened after a few torturing moments and Elyza let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. The blonde looked back to the confused group behind her, but still avoided Alicia’s eyes.

“Let’s go before they change their minds.” Elyza mumbled and walked through the gate.

Elyza expected a decontamination area, but they just hopped into a black Hover and were taken to their designated house. As everyone looked outside awed by the big city behind walls and everything the blonde could do was look down and hope for the best. She didn’t needed to look around, she knew the place. A city built over the blood and ashes of innocent people just because a bunch of millionaires wanted to be safe from the rest of the word when everything went down in flames. There was one thing bothering Elyza to no end; If they had built that city to protect themselves, then they knew something bad was coming and she was willing to find out.

“You have some serious nerve coming back after what you did, Lex.” The man behind the steering wheel looked at her thought the rearview mirror. She knew him from back in the day. He wanted to be with Elyza from day one and well, even if she was straight it wouldn’t work. He annoyed her tpp much. “And I don’t know why the fuck they would let you in. I hope Nia kicks your ass as soon as she realizes you’re here.”

“Fuck off, Finn.” She straightened her back and took off her hood. The group had forgotten about the city and was now paying attention to their conversation. Elyza didn’t blame them; they must’ve been confused as hell. “My name is still on the data so I’m still your fucking superior. If I were you I would keep my mouth bloody shut or I’ll be the one kicking your ass and not even all the ammo in the world will keep you alive out there.”

“As you wish, Commander of death.” Finn smirked and Elyza could feel her blood boiling. She hated the goddamn nickname.

“Commander of death?” Chris asked and Elyza felt like punching him. 

“Haven’t she told you?” Finn looked over his shoulder. Elyza knew she would have to tell them everything eventually, but that wasn’t how she wanted things to go. “Elyza here leads The Board.”

“Please don’t ask.”

“What’s The Board?” Alicia’s voice was emotionless and Elyza looked down once again. She couldn’t find the courage to look at the brunette.

“It’s just a little thing we have in Azgeda. It’s like a killing rank. Elyza is on top and no one has broken her record since Mount Weather.”

“Finn…” Elyza groaned.

“Three hundred in just one day is not easy to top.”

“As your Commander I demand you to stop talking, Collins!” Elyza raised her voice just like she used to do. Her angry voice always managed to scare off her subjects and judging by Finn’s face she still had it in her.

“As you wish, Commander.”

Everyone was dead silent for the rest of the ride and the tension could be cut with a knife. Elyza could feel Alicia’s eyes burning a hole into her head, but she refused to look back at the brunette. She just needed some time to think and try to put the words together. Seeing Alicia’s expression would only make it worse.

Elyza pressed her thumb against the small screen on the door, unlocking it. She had no idea how she would fit nine people in that apartment, but it was better than a boat or the apocalypse for that matter.

“Sorry it’s this small.” Elyza stood in the living room watching as everyone walked in. “I never thought I would come here, nevertheless bring anyone with me.”

“It’s big enough.” Madison smiled at her. She was confused and definitely not happy about the things she just had heard about the Australian, but she was glad Elyza was there to help them after Strand abandoned them. 

“There’s a spare room. The adults can have the bed and Raven can take the couch. It’s not a good idea to sleep on the floor in your state. I’m sure I can manage to get a few sleeping bags from the soldiers.”

“Thank God for this, then.” Raven grinned, pointing to the improvised crutch under her arm. “Good luck with the floor, Monty.”

“I’m sure they’ll give you everything you need, Commander.” Alicia crossed her arms over her chest. 

“Leeshy, don’t do this.” Elyza mumbled sadly.

“You lied to me, Elyza!” Alicia snapped, getting everyone’s attention. “Everything you said was a lie! Were you actually going to Berkeley? Are you even Australian? Is your mom actually a doctor or were you just bullshitting me?”

“Yes, I am a doctor.”

Elyza’s mom was standing on the doorway and staring at her daughter with a smile playing her lips.

“Lyza!” A blonde boy ran inside and hugged Elyza tight. “You’re back! I missed you so much!”

“I missed you too, kid.” Elyza smiled. “You’re so big! Look at you!”

“I’m so happy you’re alive.” It was time for Abby to hug her daughter. “I was so worried.”

“I was worried too. How did you get here?”

Alicia watched the reunion and she noticed neither Abby nor Aden had Australian accents. Ano more lie.

“Looks like the soldier’s families are welcome here.” Abby smiled. “I’m working at the clinic. They needed doctors.”

“Where’s dad?” Abby’ smile disappeared. “Abby, where’s Jake?”

“He didn’t make it, Lyza. I’m sorry.” The doctor tried to place a hand on her daughter’s shoulder, but Elyza stepped away.

“What do you mean by ‘he didn’t make it?’ He knew how to survive, he was strong.” Elyza’s voice cracked.

“I’m sorry, honey. I know it’s hard for you since…”

“Don’t!” The blonde shouted and Abby jumped back a little. Elyza looked up and took a deep breath. She needed to disappear, there was too many people there. “I just…Excuse me.” 

Elyza ran away from the apartment as everyone wondered when would the puzzle pieces start to fit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this chapter sucked, I'm so sorry.


	8. Chapter 8

Alicia walked down the street, looking around for the blonde. She was mad at Elyza for lying, but the woman had just found out her father had died and Alicia wasn’t the kind of person who wouldn’t care about it. She wanted to slap Elyza across the face for hiding so many about herself, but Alicia knew the feeling of losing a father like anyone else. From her perspective that could go two ways; A suffocating pain that she would forget now and then, but would never actually go away just like it had happened to Alicia or a suffocating pain that would be buried deep down through drugs, likewise Nick. She couldn’t manage to watch Elyza go down the same path Nick had gone, so there she was walking aimlessly through a city she knew nothing about trying to find the blonde to give her some support cause she knew it wouldn’t made the pain disappear, but a friend could make things a lot easier.

It took her a while, but Alicia finally found Elyza in an empty playground, sitting in a swing and burying her bare feet into the sand. 

“Hey.” Alicia almost whispered, sitting on the swing next to Elyza. She was expecting tears, but when Elyza looked up there was nothing at all. No tears, no feelings, just cold and empty eyes.

“Did my mom send you to make sure I wouldn’t do anything stupid?” 

“No, she didn’t. But I did come to make sure you wouldn’t do anything stupid. I know how it feels to lose a father and how easy it is to freak out completely and blame yourself.” Alicia explained softly and Elyza looked back to her feet.

“Yeah, I know how it feels too. My biological dad also died and so did my mother.” The pain in Elyza’s voice felt like a dagger to Alicia’s chest. “My childhood wasn’t the best one ever. My parents were drug addicts. One day when I was at school he used something that made him go completely insane. He killed my mom and then killed himself.” 

“I’m so sorry, El.” Alicia felt like holding Elyza tight against her, but she didn’t want to cross any line. Elyza was actually opening up and she didn’t want to stop that.

“I was eight years old and it destroyed me. It was from then on that the emptiness started. No one wanted the daughter of two drug addicts so I was thrown around foster homes until Abby and Jake showed up and brought me to the US.” Elyza gripped the swing chains and closed her eyes. “They gave me everything; a house, a good education, a little brother and love. But I just couldn’t love them back, I didn’t cared about them and it was killing me cause I really wanted to love them back, specially Aden. I wanted to make sure he didn’t end up like me, a self-destructing mess looking for some sort feeling besides pain and anger.”

“What happened?” Alicia asked, curiosity getting the best of her.

“I went down the same path my parents had gone. After Abby and Jake realized rehab was useless Jake talked to some people and they sent me to the army. I gave everything of me and became the best soldier and my dad was so proud of me.” Elyza smiled softly and looked at Alicia. “And then I heard about Azgeda. I did the test and they accepted me. Jake’s pride turned into disappointment and I became a heartless mercenary.”

“You are not heartless, Elyza.”

“But I used to be. I used to play by their rules. Kill whoever they tell you to and don’t ask questions. I got into Azgeda cause maybe if I couldn’t feel love I could at least feel regret, it would be better than anger and I would feel more human. But it didn’t happen until Mount Weather.” The teenager opened her mouth, ready to ask about Mount Weather but Elyza was already on it. “Mount Weather was the name of the mission. They said some millionaires wanted to build some sort of post apocalyptical shelter here in Baja but there were people living here that wouldn’t leave so they hired us to come here and kill everything that moved. And so we did it.”

Alicia looked at Elyza waiting for her to continue. She wanted to say she couldn’t imagine Elyza doing something like that, but the teenager knew what the Australian was capable of. She knew Elyza could kill a human being, but she didn’t thought that caring and lovable girl could commit genocide, but yet there she was confessing everything to Alicia.

“When we finished it I was walking around looking for anyone who was hurt to execute them and I found a little boy around Aden’s age. He was still alive but he was choking into his own blood while holding a dead woman’s hand who I believed was his mother. That was when I broke down completely.” Elyza looked at Alicia once again and the brunette could swear she had never seen so much sorrow into one’s soul. “Everything that I had ever done came rushing into me and I felt completely lost. I left Azgeda without a word, got a fake identity, got into college and started to live like anyone else. The emptiness was still there, but I swore to myself that I would never put myself above anyone else. I was so selfish and so focused on myself that I ended hundreds of lives just because I couldn’t keep it together. I never apologized to my dad for entering Azgeda and now he’s dead.”

“Why haven’t you told me this before?”

“I didn’t want to scare you off and I’m not proud of the person I used to be. Strand was supposed to get you and your family in and I would stay on the outside taking care of the others. No one was supposed to know about my past, but I had no choice. Things won’t ever get easier; at least you would be safe on the inside. You deserve to live happily and not worrying about being eaten alive.” 

Alicia stop up, kneeled in front of Elyza and placed her arms around her waist just like the blonde had done to her earlier that day. There were no tears streaming down Elyza’s face, but Alicia was broken by how such a powerful woman had turned into a scared little animal in such a short period of time.

“You deserve it too, El.” Alicia almost whispered and leaned in, kissing Elyza’s lips softly.

“Does that mean you don’t hate me?” Elyza asked, eyes still closed.

“It also means that if you lie to me again…”

“I won’t.” Elyza cut Alicia off. “I swear, Alicia. The way you looked at me today… I don’t ever want to feel that way again. I disappointed my father, I won’t disappoint you too.”

“Good.” Alicia stood up and offered a hand to the girl in front of her. Elyza took it with a smile and stood up from the swing. “Let’s go, your mom said some of us can stay at her place until we get a bigger place.”

“Sleeping in my mom’s couch. Sounds fun.” Elyza said sarcastically.

“Actually Aden offered me his room.”

“Wait, what?” Elyza stopped in her tracks, shocked. Alicia stared at her confused. “Aden said you could sleep in his room?”

“Why are you so shocked?” Alicia laughed.

“Aden hardly lets me walk into his room and… Oh!” The blonde’s eyes went wide. “He has a crush on you.”

“Yeah, sure.” Alicia rolled her eyes and kept on walking.

“I’m serious!” Elyza ran after Alicia. “My little brother is trying to steal my girlfriend. Jesus, I’m too old.”

Alicia stopped in her track suddenly.

“Girlfriend?” The teenager looked at a blushing Elyza.

“I meant friend.” Alicia looked down disappointed and started walking again. “Unless you want to be my girlfriend!” Elyza shouted, making Alicia turn around. “Cause that would be amazing. And I never had a girlfriend so it would be twice as amazing if you were my first. Girlfriend I mean cause I’m not a virgin I know how to have sex, I am awesome actually.” Alicia smiled at how Elyza’s nerves were making her ramble. “Not that I had sex with thousands of girls, I just know my way down a girl’s body… Around! My way around a girl’s body and…”

“Yes, Elyza.” Alicia walked closer to the blonde. “I’ll be your girlfriend.”

“Aden will be so pissed.” Elyza grinned before pulling Alicia closer and kissing her. “I can’t wait to see his face.”

“Don’t be mean, he’s a great boy.” Elyza stared at her with an eyebrow raised. “But I’m way more into his sister.”

__________________________________________________________________________________________

“Moooom!” Elyza whined. “Please stop!”

“Abby, don’t you dare listening to your daughter.” Alicia smiled, amused by Elyza’s childhood pictures Abby was showing to her, Raven and Monty.

“You can whine all you want, Elyza. It’s the first time you bring friends home, it’s my duty as a mother to embarrass you.” 

“Look at this one!” Raven laughed, pointing at a picture of Elyza covered in frosting from Aden’s second birthday. 

“I really like cake, ok?” Elyza rolled her eyes and Alicia smiled. Even though the blonde had told her everything about her past she couldn’t see Elyza as a heartless mercenary. Actually, the Australian was the most kind and lovingly person she had ever met. Elyza looked back at Alicia and smiled before yawning. “I think I’m going to bed. It was a hard day.”

“Me too.” Alicia passed the photo album to Raven and stood up. Her body and mind were completely crashed. 

“Good night, Alicia.” Aden said with dreamy eyes.

“Good night, Aden.” The brunette smiled brightly. “Thanks again for letting me stay in your room.”

“You can thank me with a date.” Aden smirked and Alicia couldn’t help but laugh at how much the boy and Elyza were alike even though they weren’t actually siblings.

“Okay, I think that’s our cue.” Elyza grabbed Alicia’s hand and went upstairs. “When I taught Aden how do flirt I didn’t thought he would be flirting with my girlfriend. If I knew I wouldn’t have taught him so well.”

“Is Elyza Lex afraid of a little competition?” Alicia teased, walking into Aden’s room with Elyza right behind her.

“Competition?” Elyza laughed. “Please, Aden’s got nothing on me, love.” The woman pulled Alicia into her and pecked her lips a few times. “It looks like my mom also likes you a lot so It’s a good start. I think she’ll be happy about it when I tell her about us.”

“What can I say, I have that effect on the Lex family.” Alicia smiled and walked backwards until the bed, pulling Elyza with her. “May we finish what we started earlier today?”

Elyza smiled and placed a leg on which side of the brunette, straddling her. 

“You know what…” The Australian pulled her shirt over her head and laughed at how hypnotized Alicia looked by her boobs. “Aden will freak out when he finds out I made you come in his bed.”

Alicia felt the wetness between her legs at Elyza’s words. The brunette unclasped her girlfriends bra and attacked one of her nipples with her mouth. Alicia enjoyed the noise that left Elyza’s mouth as she cursed herself in her head. When had she become so… thirsty?

Elyza got rid of Alicia’s shirt and bra and pushed her down into the bed, their naked upper bodies rubbing against each other, making Alicia grab a fist full of blonde hair as Elyza kissed and sucked into her neck.

“You’re so wet…” Elyza’s husky voice warmed her earlobe as she felt the blonde’s hand cupping her center over her panties. “Tell me, love. What do you want me to do?” 

Alicia pushed her hips up, desperate for more contact as her cheeks burned red. One thing Alicia had learned from their heated make out sessions was that Elyza absolutely loved dirty talking.

“I want you to fuck me.” Alicia answered in a moan. “I need to come, please Elyza make me come.”

Elyza got on her knees and grabbed Alicia’s waistband, pulling both her jeans and panties down hungrily but only exposing much before someone knocked on the door.

“Girls…” Abby’s voice called from the outside.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Elyza rolled her eyes, getting off of Alicia. “Why the hell this keeps happening every time we’re almost there?”

“Just find out what she wants and come back here.” Alicia whined, looking down at where her pants were. They were almost there!

Elyza opened the door enough to see her mother and rolled her eyes.

“Yes, Abby?” The blonde said annoyed.

“Put your clothes on. You’re sleeping with me and Alicia will be sharing with Raven.” Elyza wanted to ask Abby how she managed to find out about her and Alicia already but she decided otherwise. Her mom not only was smart but could also read Elyza like a book.

“Come on, mom! I’m twenty six, I think I can sleep in the same bed as my girlfriend.”

“Not while she’s underage.” Elyza’s eye went wide. “I’m not stupid, Elyza. Madison asked me to take care of her daughter and you are not having sex in your brother’s bed.”

“Aden would never know.” Abby raised one of her eyebrows and stared at her daughter. “Moooom!” Elyza pouted and did her best puppy eyes.

“I’ll make sure she’s in your bedroom in five minutes.” An already fully clothed Alicia showed herself to Abby. “We should have imagined you would rather keep an eye on us.”

“What? You’re fine with this?” Elyza turned around to Alicia, forgetting about the door and not caring if her mother saw she was naked from the waist up.

“It’s her house, her rules. And I don’t want to start this relationship with the wrong foot.” Alicia handed Elyza her bra and t shirt. “Let’s do this right, El.”

“She’s a smart girl.” Abby grinned as Elyza put her clothes back on.

“She’s kissing your ass, that’s what she’s doing.” Elyza rolled her eyes and pecked Alicia’s lips softly before leaving. “Good night, Leeshy Loo.”

“Night, El.” 

Alicia closed the bedroom door once again and leaned against it, taking a deep breath. The teenager moved a little, felling the wetness between her legs. It would be a long and frustrating stay.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Elyza had never felt so nervous in her entire life. Her leg was bouncing and her hands were ridiculously sweaty. It wasn’t the first time she had been called to Nia’s office. When it happened back in the day it was always to receive some sort of medal for her work and she was usually way more well-dressed than black jeans, heels and a button up white shirt. The Azgeda owner was the only person able to scare Elyza. Those ice cold eyes, fur coats and expensive jewelry were able to make Elyza shake like a leaf.

“She’s ready for you.” The receptionist called and Elyza stood up, already feeling her heart beating in her throat.

The Australian walked into the fancy office with her head held high. She couldn’t show fear even though she was sure Nia was able to smell it on her. The older woman looked scarier than Elyza remembered.

“Wanheda!” Nia smile reminded her of an angry wolf. “Please, have a sit.”

“Nia.” Elyza greeted and sat down in the leather chair across from Nia’s desk. “Roan.” 

“Commander.” Roan nodded at the blonde. Elyza couldn’t help but feel pity for Roan. They used to be friends when Elyza was in Azgeda. The man never wanted to be part of that, but yet his mother forced him to learn so he would take care of the business after she was gone.

Truth was only a few people from Azgeda were in there because they actually wanted too, most of them were just a legacy, serving as soldiers because their parents used to be part of the private army. It was like that with the Blakes and Lincoln, her best friends in there and the only ones she was able to count on when she decided to abandon Azgeda.

“You wanted to see me.” Elyza asked, wanting to go straight to the point.

“Indeed.” Nia rested her hands over the table. “My counselors believe I should punish you for deserting Azgeda, but I told them such a talent like yours should not go to waste.”

“I’m not working for you again, Nia.” Elyza felt her courage coming back.

“It’s not up for discussion, Lex. You will grab your new uniform on your way out and take over the wall patrol along with the Blakes. Your Commander patent will be kept.”

“I don’t think your counselors or soldiers will be happy about it.”

“They are my subjects and they will do as I say.” Nia smirked.

“I’m going to say this one last time. I am not working for you again, Nia.” Elyza growled and stood up, ready to leave.

“Then tell your guests to pack their things. They are all useless anyway.” The blonde stopped in her tracks. She should have seen that coming. “Monty and Raven can stay. They are both very smart and useful for Azgeda.”

“The others can be useful too.” Elyza turned around. “Travis is great with maintenance, Daniel used to be a guerilla and…”

“And then we have two teenagers, a drug addict, a school counselor and Ofelia who does God knows what. From where I stand they are completely useless for us.” Nia reasoned. “I’ll be offering then a house big enough for all of them, shelter from the walkers and endless supplies. All I’m asking in return is my best soldier back. What will it be, Elyza?”

“Nia…” Elyza mumbled.

“I’ll make sure they’re safe.” The blonde looked up at her former boss. Nia was a heartless bitch, but she was a woman of word. “Especially Alicia. I know you care about her the most.”

Elyza looked at her feet and took a deep breath. That was bound to happen. It didn’t matter how much she ran from her past or how many times she would tell herself she was a different person, she would always fall back into the rabbit hole because that was all Elyza was, all that she knew how to be and what she did best. Maybe that was the fate's way of telling her she would always be an assassin, she would always be Wanheda.

“When do I start?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments on the last chapter! They made me so happy! You are all precious little things and I love all of you.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay guys. This chapter might be a little triggering. There is drugs, suicide and depression mentions and an almost death.  
> And before you hate on me just remember I'M NOT JASON ROTTENBURGUER.

For Alicia’s dismay, she haven’t seen Elyza as often as she used to. In the beginning she blamed it on the fact that her family and the rest of the group were relocated into bigger houses away from Elyza's place, which she was glad cause she didn’t know how long she would be able to share a room with Raven. She became good friends with the mechanic really quickly, but Raven couldn’t stop moving during sleep and she snored a lot. Alicia loved Raven, but she also loved a good night of sleep.

She blamed the distance between their houses, but truth was that Elyza felt distant. The beautiful blue eyes looked empty, the smile looked fake, the smirk was long gone and the blonde would ignore Alicia’s kisses almost every time, turning her head so the peck would land on her cheek or pass up a make out session by saying she was way too tired. In the beginning Alicia believed. Working on the clinic with Abby must’ve been exhausting, but the distance started to grow bigger by the month and Alicia was hurting to say the least, so she decided to finally face the blonde.

“Don’t you want to be with me anymore?” Alicia almost whispered as they lay on her bedroom, some random movie playing in the background.

“What?” Elyza faked a laugh, but she couldn’t hide her heart beating faster from the brunette laying on her chest.

“You’ve been so distant for the last two months.”

“I told you, love. I’m just really tired from working at the clinic. I’ve been taking some extra shifts since we’re lacking on doctors.” The Australian lied, trying to keep her heartbeat steady.

“Hum…” Alicia hummed against Elyza’s chest. “You don’t kiss me anymore.”

Elyza took a deep breath. She indeed stopped kissing Alicia but not because she didn’t liked the teenager anymore, but because she couldn’t. Elyza felt disgusted with herself and kissing Alicia was like soiling her full lips with her demons and Alicia didn’t need that. Elyza’s pain was hers and no one else’s. The Australian smiled lightly and connected her lips with Alicia’s softly. It was only when Alicia tried to deepen the kiss that Elyza pulled away and sat on the bed.

“It’s late, I have to go.” Elyza mumbled, going for her boots. “I’m going to the clinic earlier tomorrow.”

“El…”

“I’ll text you.” 

Elyza pecked Alicia’s lips and almost ran away. That was the moment Alicia was one hundred per cent sure that something was wrong with her girlfriend.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“You look like shit.” Roan smirked and sat next to Elyza, legs hanging from the big wall that surrounded Arkadia.

“You are so lovely, Roan.” Elyza threw the cigarette she had finished down the wall and lit a new one. Wall patrols were boring and she would expend most of the time playing cards with Bellamy, Lincoln and Octavia, but that day she felt like being alone. “Which feature seduced you the most? The huge bags under my eyes?”

“Actually I was going for the horrible smell.” Elyza laughed humorlessly. It had been a good three days since she last showered. She just didn’t felt like doing nothing but laying on her couch in silence or painting something now and then. “I left those files you asked me for in your mail box. If anyone asks, you didn’t saw me.”

“Thanks, Roan.” The blonde looked down at the already finished cigarette in her hands. She used to smoke a lot, but never like that. She looked and smelled like a goddamn chimney. Elyza just pulled another cigarette and placed it between her lips.

“Easy there, buddy.” Roan pulled the cigarette from her lips before Elyza could light it. “What’s up with you, El?”

“Your mom is forcing me to work for her and I feel like I’m going insane in this place.” Elyza went to grab another cigarette, but the package was empty. “Fuck.”

“I know it sucks.” Roan mumbled. “But just remember why you’re doing this. Alicia is safe.”

“But I’m hurting her.” Elyza finally looked at the man next to her. “The late shifts are keeping me away from her and every time we get the chance to be together I just… I feel dirty, Roan. I feel like I’m constantly covered in blood and I don’t want to stain Alicia’s beautiful and pure self. I feel disgusted when I touch her so I don’t do it, but she is starting to think I don’t want her anymore when in fact I don’t want anything else.”

“Have you tried talking to her?”

“She would freak out. I promised I would never lie to her again and I just did that when I accepted Nia’s offer.”

“Well, I think you don’t have a choice right now.” Roan pointed behind Elyza with a sad expression.

Elyza looked behind her just to find an angry looking Alicia. The Australian stood up, heart racing in her chest. She didn’t need words. The look on the teenager’s face was enough for her. She had lost Alicia.

“I went to the clinic. Your mom told me you never worked there.” Alicia looked Elyza from head to toes, taking in the black clothes and machine gun hanging on her shoulder. “You actually prefer killing people than saving then after all.”

“Alicia, I can explain…”

“You promised me you would never lie to me again, Elyza. I guess it was just another one of your lies.” Alicia turned around and walked away. Elyza was completely frozen. She wanted to run after the brunette but her feet were heavy and her head was spinning. 

Everything was falling apart slowly right in front of her eyes.

________________________________________________________________________________

Elyza was a mess. Roan managed to get her a break so she could try and get better, but things just went downhill. She couldn’t remember when was the last time she showered or eaten or drank something that didn’t have alcohol in it. Her apartment was dark and smoky, the air was thick and smelled like a dirty roadway bar. There were paintings everywhere; most of them were from Alicia or chaotic images of the massacre. Elyza wanted to get rid of her past and her pain and have Alicia back. The Australian knew she would never have Alicia back so she just found herself a new girlfriend; actually it was an old girlfriend that had come back to her, leaving the thin syringe and getting into her veins, taking away the pain and suffering.

The files Roan had given to her were scattered over the center table along with an overloaded ashtray, a few empty bottles and her faithful syringe. Elyza looked at the files once again, anger growing in her chest. It was all a lie, she had been used from the start. The blonde stood up from the couch roughly and kicked the center table, everything that was on it flying across the room. 

Elyza got a blank canvas ready and grabbed her last bottle of vodka. Painting and destroying herself, that was all she had left.

_______________________________________________________________________________

“I can’t believe my baby girl is turning eighteen.” Madison smiled, hugging Alicia tightly.

“Chill, mom. It’s not like I’m leaving for college or anything.” Alicia hugged her mother back. Her eighteen birthday used to be a promise of finally being completely connected to Elyza, but now it was just one more year.

“Hey, turning eighteen is something big, kid. Now you’re legal.” Raven smiled.

“But that doesn’t mean that you’ll do whatever you feel like to. I’m still your mother.” Madison let go of Alicia and went to the kitchen.

“I know, mom.” Alicia rolled her eyes and sat next to Raven. 

Alicia really didn’t wanted to celebrate her birthday, but Madison and Travis had insisted to throw a small party. It wasn’t like Alicia had a lot of friends, so the ‘party’ ended up being a meet up between her family, the Salazars, Monty and Raven. She would say everyone she cared about was there, but the lack of a certain blonde was something that didn’t went unnoticed.

“Oh, the beautiful age of eighteen.” Nick smiled, sticking his finger into the cake and licking it. “It was the first time I used.”

“Nick…” Madison censured her son.

“What? I’m just saying it was a time filled with new stuff.”

“New stuff that almost killed you.” Alicia rolled her eyes.

“New stuff nonetheless.”

Being close to her family and friends made Alicia feel better. It distracted her from her broken heart, as cheesy as it sounded. It had only hit her after she found out Elyza was working for Azgeda again, but truth was that Elyza hadn’t been herself for a long time. It made Alicia wonder if the sarcastic and flirty girl she met on the radio was Elyza’s true self or just a mask. It hurt her to think that maybe the girl she had fallen for never existed.

The girl she had fallen for… If someone told Alicia a few months ago that she would fall in love with a girl she would have laughed so hard. That Alicia didn’t know Elyza or how good the blonde could make her feel by just holding her hand.

“ALICIA!” The loud scream was followed by several hard knocks on the front door. “LEESHY LOO!”

“What the hell is happening?” Travis walked to the door, but Alicia ran and stopped him.

“I got this, Travis. Don’t worry.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Alicia reassured and turned around, opening the door slightly.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LOVE!” Elyza busted into the house, falling drunkenly into Alicia’s arms. “You’re eighteen now, I’m going to fuck you into oblivion.” The blonde smirked thinking she was whispering to Alicia when in fact the teenager was sure all of her guests had listened to Elyza’s words. “I’m your sexy gift and you won’t be able to sit for a whole week!”

“What is happening?” Madison stepped in.

“I got this mom, don’t worry.” Alicia shot a desperate look to Nick who ran into her direction. 

“Madison, I’ll marry your daughter someday. Just watch me!” Nick grabbed Elyza’s legs as Alicia grabbed the blonde’s arms. The siblings lifted the drunken woman and started carrying her to Alicia’s bedroom. “We’ll be the gayest and most beautiful couple of the apocalypse!” 

“Jesus, she smells like garbage.” Nick mumbled, throwing Elyza into Alicia’s bed.

“Help me undress her and take her to the bathroom. I’m not letting her sleep in my bed smelling like this.” 

Nick started pulling onto Elyza’s boots and Alicia hopped into the bed to try and undress the blonde’s upper body, but drunk Elyza was endlessly hornier than sober Elyza.

“Sibling’s threesome! Thank you, Jesus!” Elyza screamed when she realized both Nick and Alicia were undressing her. The Australian grabbed Alicia by the waist and pulled her down. “Sit on my face!”

Alicia stood up, freeing herself form Elyza’s hands and glared at her brother who couldn’t stop laughing.

“Stop laughing and help me, you idiot.”

Alicia and Nick changed places and as the brunette pulled Elyza’s pants down she could help but think that that wasn’t how she imagined herself undressing Elyza on her eighteen birthday at all.

“Hum… Alicia.” Nick said awkwardly. Alicia looked up and saw Nick holding Elyza’s left arm up, showing her the needle bruises she got used to seeing on Nick’s arms. “They’re fresh. She’s not just drunk. If she actually mixed alcohol and whatever this is, we have a problem.”

“No, no, no…” Alicia hopped on the bed and held Elyza’s head between her hands. She couldn’t lose Elyza, not for good. She had almost lost Nick several times because of drugs and she wasn’t going to lose Elyza too. “El, what did you used? You have to tell me so I can help you.”

“I never wanted to hurt you…” Elyza whispered, caressing Alicia’s cheek. “I just wanted you to be happy. I wanted to be happy.” Tears started to stream down Elyza’s face and Alicia couldn’t stop her own from falling. It was the first time she ever saw the blonde cry and those weren’t drunken tears, they were as real as they could get. The pain in Elyza’s eyes was unbearable and Alicia almost looked away. “Why can’t I be happy, Leeshy?”

Alicia dried her own tears roughly.

“Elyza, what did you took?” The brunette tried once again.

“Morphine.” Alicia almost didn’t catch the whisper that left Elyza’s lips. The brunette looked at her brother, expecting his expert diagnostic. 

“I’m calling Abby. You keep her awake no matter what.”

A few more tears fell from Alicia’s eyes as she watched how unbelievably broken Elyza looked and asked herself how much pain someone had to go through to rely on morphine to make it go away. Nick was a sensitive boy so Alicia wasn’t shocked when he started using after their father’s death, but Elyza was far away from that. The woman was strong and had gone through a lot, she was wiser than falling into old habits.

“El, look at me. You can’t fall asleep.” Alicia held Elyza’s face gently. “You need to stay with me.”

“But I’m so tired…” Elyza said between sobs. “So fucking tired.”

“I know, but you need to keep your eyes open.” Alicia tore away her eyes from Elyza for a second when she heard the door opening. It wasn’t the medical help she needed, but she felt glad when she saw Madison walking into the room. Her mother had taken care of Nick and knew how to deal with a drug addict like anyone else. “If you stay awake I’ll let you draw me again.”

“I’ve been drawing you for the last month, love.” Elyza caressed the brunette’s cheek softly. “Your face…It’s hard to forget… What you love…” The blonde blinked heavily, drifting slowly to sleep.

“No, stay awake, Elyza!” Alicia shook the girl slightly, but Elyza was already asleep. 

Madison sat next to her daughter and held Elyza’s wrist. The Australian had drunkenly invaded her house and screamed about how she would have sex with her daughter, but if it wasn’t for Elyza she wouldn’t have a safe place to call her home. She owed her that much.

“Her pulse is dangerously low.” Madison almost whispered and before she could do anything Elyza’s body started to shake violently as she puked profusely. 

Alicia held Elyza’s head to the side so she wouldn’t choke on her own vomit and waited for the convulsion to stop. She saw herself back at where it all started, holding Nick’s head against their house’s floor waiting for his attack to stop as she called him names. Back then she still didn’t know about the walkers or that she was witnessing the end of the world. Back then things were easier.

As Alicia held Elyza’s head to the side she realized she cared for the blonde more than she ever cared for Nick and it scared her.

Once the attack stopped Madison reached for Elyza’s wrist once again, feeling nothing. She looked up at her daughter with sad eyes and tears started to stream down Alicia’s face instantly.

“No, no, no!” Alicia screamed, placing both her hands on Elyza’s chest and starting the cardiac massage she had learn back at school. She pushed down ten times before breathing into Elyza’s mouth, not caring about the vomit that soiled her lips. “Don’t you die on me, you asshole!” 

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. Alicia kept on trying to bring Elyza back while Madison stared at the pain and hopelessness that started to take over her daughter. The eighteen year old felt her arms ache, but she couldn’t stop, she didn’t want to stop. Even after Nick busted into the room followed by Abby and other two doctors and pushed her away from Elyza so they could work on the blonde she tried to get away from his grip to keep trying to bring the woman back.

Alicia struggled with Nick as Abby and her assistants defibrillated Elyza’s lifeless body. It was nothing but a blur and Nick only let go of her once they had removed Elyza from her bedroom. 

Alicia ran downstairs and watched as the woman was taken away in an ambulance.

Alicia curled into a ball in her mother’s bed and cried herself to sleep.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________

The annoying beep was making her head ache and it felt like someone had punched her in the chest really hard. Elyza opened her eyes lazily and looked around, trying to remember how she ended up tied to a hospital bed with a tired Alicia sitting next to her and using her thigh as a pillow.

Elyza placed her hand over the messy brown hair and scratched Alicia’ scalp fondly. The teenager jumped slightly and rubbed her tired eyes before standing up and slapping Elyza across the face.

“Don’t ever do this again!” Alicia cried, not being able to keep her emotions in. “I swear to God, Elyza. If you pull this on me again I’ll kill you myself!”

Elyza didn’t remember what she had done, but it wasn’t the first time she had heard that or woken up in a hospital like that, she knew what it meant. She knew she had either mixed her drugs or fucked up the dosage. Alicia had every right to slap her.

“I’m sorry.” Elyza mumbled. She wasn’t sorry for almost killing herself, she was sorry for making Alicia go through that. “I was just sad.”

Alicia sat down defeated when she caught a glance of that same pain she had seen last night on Elyza’s blue eyes. 

“What’s happening, El? Please tell me. Let me help you.” 

“You can’t.”

“Let me be the one to judge that, okay?” Alicia held the blonde’s hand tightly. “Please, tell me. Let me in, Elyza.”

Elyza took a deep breath and looked into Alicia’s eyes and saw something that she almost never seen directed to her. She saw care. She saw love. But how Alicia kept being able to look at her like that after all she had done was something she would never understand.

“It started when we first arrived. Nia called me into her office. She said that she would give you and your family shelter if I worked for her again.” Elyza confessed. “I dressed that Azgeda uniform and I felt disgusted with myself. I look in the mirror and I don’t see myself anymore, I just see Wanheda and her blood stained hair. I didn’t wanted to be around you cause I felt like I would hurt you somehow. You guys look around and see a safe place… All I can see is my demons. I close my eyes and I see their faces. This place is killing me, Leeshy.”

Alicia tightened her grip on Elyza’s hand to encourage her to keep going. 

“Things got worse after you found out, but what took me over the edge was Abby. I wanted to know more about the walkers so I did some research and found out that she was in the team that created the virus that brings people back. They were trying to find a way to enlarge patients’ lives so they would have more time to try and save them, but it got out of hand.” Alicia got closer and dried the tears that left Elyza’s eyes given that the blonde couldn’t reach her own face. “The non mutated virus was originally from Australian so they just grabbed a bunch of orphans in an age group that they believed could be immune to the virus. I think you can guess the rest.”

“Elyza…” Alicia mumbled sadly.

“I thought she loved me, but I was nothing but a lab rat.”

“Did you talk to her? Maybe she has an explanation.”

“I did.” Elyza looked down to her lap, trying to hide her tears from Alicia. “She said everything changed the moment she saw me, but she couldn’t look me in the eyes and say that she never used me for her research.” The Australian looked up again and stared at Alicia with bloodshot eyes. “Why can’t I be happy, Alicia? Why the people who were supposed to love me keep on hurting me? I know I hurt them too, but I’m trying to redeem myself for years now and it seems like the world keeps throwing shit at me so I can feel all the pain that I caused. Is this all I deserve? Retaliation?”

Alicia stood up and threw her arms around Elyza’s neck, hugging her tightly. That was the moment in which she decided she would do anything to make Elyza understand how amazing she was. She would go to hell and back to make the woman happy and save her from her fears.

“I love you, El.” Alicia confessed in Elyza’s ear. “And I’m never letting you down.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little less drama, more fluff and smut for my little devils.

Elyza opened her eyes slowly, stomach growling with the smell of eggs and bacon and she knew Alicia had used the spare key to her apartment Elyza had given her. The Australian couldn’t feel more stupid about not talking to Alicia earlier. She knew the brunette was comprehensive and mature, but she didn’t expect her to jump head first into helping Elyza not only get rid of her addiction but also try and find a way to easy her spirit.

On the first week Alicia helped Elyza get clean, bringing her medicine, making her delicious soups, making her warm when she had a fever and sleeping next to her to make site everything was okay and for Elyza’s surprise even Nick, Madison and Ofelia ended up helping. 

On the second week Alicia and Elyza cleaned up the blonde’s apartment and it was one of the hardest tasks. They had cleaned everything more than twice and the place still smelled lile death, smoke and cheap alcohol. The hardest part from cleaning was getting rid of Elyza’s paintings, not because she liked then, but because looking at them made her chest ache. 

Alicia couldn’t help but notice the beauty behind the tragedy and darkness that were Elyza's paintings. There was blood and war. Death and pain, but Alicia’s favorite was a self-portrait of Wanheda. The face looked exactly like Elyza’s, but her hair was red, soiled on blood. The Azgeda uniform had blood stains everywhere and even though the girl’s face was completely static Alicia was open mouthed with her blue eyes. Alicia liked art, thanks to Matt who would always take her to museums she knew art and from all of the paintings she had ever seen on her life she never knew it was possible for two blue spots in a wide canvas show so much emotion. It was harsh and raw. It was the second that Wanheda realized that there was no such thing as commanding death. It was the second she realized she was nothing but a human, nothing but Elyza Lex.

They had only kept the paintings in which Alicia was the main and only focus, but when Elyza went to take a shower the eighteen year old grabbed the Wanheda self-portrait. Alicia wanted to keep it for herself. Looking at that piece made Alicia start to understand the commander so she could finally understand Elyza. 

The next step was taking care of Elyza’s mental health and she was glad by the work license Roan had gotten Elyza because it would take some time. This part was handed to Madison. Even though the older Clark worked with teenagers as a school counselor, she indeed had a psychology degree. The first sessions were rough as Elyza had a hard time opening up for Madison, she didn’t had the calming and understanding look her daughter held, in fact Elyza found Madison intimidating to say the least. That and opening up for the mother of the girl you expected to spend the rest of your life with could be scary. It was like giving Madison all the information she would need to sabotage their relationship if she felt like it, but it wasn’t like Elyza had a choice. She didn't wanted to rely on drugs ever again. 

Madison was surprised by Elyza's story to say the least. She went from shocked by all the killing to sad about how it broke the Australian as Elyza jumped from talking in anger about herself to holding back tears every time she mentioned her family and Madison defiantly couldn't ignore the wide smile every time the blonde mentioned Alicia. 

“I told her this already, but I don’t think all the words and thanks in the world are enough after everything Alicia did for me. She thinks she’s helping me right now but the truth is she helped me from the second she answered me on the radio.” Elyza' poured all of her feelings in a smile. “I know I hurt myself here in Arkadia to protect her, but even when I was scared I would end up hurting her she managed to make me feel at ease. Alicia has something about her that I have never seen in anyone else”.

Yes, Alicia indeed was special and Madison could tell it from day one. She remembered the small brunette helping her take care of sick Nick and staying up with the boy during the night so Madison could get some sleep. Alicia helped Madison at all times even when she didn't realize it.

“I not only wanted to protect her from the walkers.” Elyza lowered her voice. “I wanted to protect her from everything that could try and change the beautiful soul she is”

“I’m glad you found a friend in Alicia.” Madison answered, giving emphasis to the word friend.

“Yes…” Elyza’ smile disappeared. “She’s my friend.”

And that was how Madison’s try to keep Elyza in her place as nothing but a friend to her daughter turned into an encouragement. The Australian went home and stared at her recently acquired phone for about fifteen minutes thinking about her words until she decided to just go with it. She was Elyza Lex, for Christ sake! She didn’t get nervous around women, she made them nervous.

Alicia was laying on the couch with her head on Nick’s lap when her phone vibrated.

 **Elyza**  
Tonight. Wear something fancy but comfortable. I’ll pick you up at 7.

Alicia smiled at the text before answering.

 **Leeshy Loo**  
Are you asking me on a date, Lex?

 **Elyza**  
I sure am, Clark. I just realized I was a horrible girlfriend and that we never had a proper date before I went completely bananas. Let me make it up to you.

 **Leeshy Loo**  
It’s a date then =)

“Hey, could you help me tonight?” Alicia asked, looking up at Nick.

“Yeah, sure. What do you need?”

“Elyza just asked me out. Just keep mom busy until I get the hell away from here. I don’t need her asking a million questions about where I’m going.”

“A date, huh?” Nick smirked.

“Who’s got a date?” Ofelia walked in, sitting next to Nick and interlacing their fingers. Alicia didn’t knew when it had happened, but her brother and Ofelia were together and she had never seen Nick glowing like he did when the Salvadoran woman was around.

“Alicia has a date with Elyza tonight.” Nick smiled at Ofelia. “She needs me to keep my mom busy so she can go out without further questions.”

“I knew you two had a thing.” Ofelia smirked.

“Everyone kinda found out after my birthday.” Alicia rolled her eyes, remembering Elyza’s little show.

“Not mom. She still thinks that was just Elyza on drugs.” 

“Where are you guys going?” Ofelia asked with excited. 

“I have no idea, she just told me to wear something fancy.”

“Can I help you get ready? Pleeeease?” Ofelia joined her hands and smiled innocently. 

“Yes, please.” Alicia smiled, standing up. “I don’t probably don’t even have something fancy.”

“We’ll figure it out.”

Ofelia really knew how to work things out. Alicia looked herself in the mirror and smiled, thinking about how she would never manage to look like that without the older woman’s help. 

“You look beautiful ‘Licia.” Ofelia smiled, standing behind her. “I’m sure you’ll have Elyza drooling.”

Alicia also felt beautiful. Her hair was loose and thrown to the side, her lips painted red and her eyeliner was discrete, but it was enough to make her green eyes pop. The high heels weren’t that uncomfortable and she was wearing a loose black dress with a gap that went up to her tight. Her back was completely uncovered and the V cut in the front showed a lot of cleavage.

“Thanks, Of.” Alicia turned around and hugged the woman. 

“It was nothing. You’re like my little sister now, ‘Licia. I can see how happy you get just by the mention of Elyza’s name. I want you to be happy.” 

Alicia’s eyes started to water and she stepped back, taking a deep breath so she wouldn’t smudge her make up. Her sister… Alicia liked how that sounded. Actually, she loved it.

The two women heard screaming coming from downstairs. That was Alicia’s cue.

“Have fun, kid.” Ofelia smiled. “But not too much fun.” The Salvadoran woman winked and Alicia could feel her cheeks burning up.

Alicia ran downstairs - at least she tried. Running and wearing heels was a bad idea. - ignoring the screaming as Madison lecture Nick about something she didn’t cared. The brunette spotted a rover parked in front of her house as a tall and tanned man stood next to the passenger door. Alicia got closer and the man smiled at her.

“Alicia, right?” The man extended his hand and Alicia took it with a small smile playing in her lips. “I’m Lincoln, Elyza’s friend. She asked me to pick you up. For some reason I will never understand she thought that waiting for you at the restaurant would be ‘a lot smoother’.” 

“That does sound like that dork.” 

“It does.” Lincoln opened the passenger door. “Shall we?”

Alicia was nervous. She was close to Elyza and they had shared all kinds of moments, but a date was something else. She didn’t know how to act or what to do. Matt had never taken her on a date. They relationship kind of just started one day out of the blue. He was her best friend and suddenly they kissed, just like it had happened between her and Elyza. Alicia just shook the thought away as she Lincoln pulled in front of what was probably the fanciest restaurant she had even seen.

“There you go.” Elyza’s friend smiled. “Have fun, you two.”

“Thanks Lincoln.”

A man wearing a fancy suit walked Alicia into the restaurant, leading her to the table where Elyza was waiting. Once she approached the table Elyza stood up from her chair, smiling brightly. The Australian was breathtaking. Elyza wore a black tailored suit that hugged her body in all the right places, a white button up shirt that had the two upper buttons up and a pair of high heels that made everything look more feminine. Her hair was loose and curled and her makeup was minimum and light just like Alicia’s.

“You look…” Elyza breathed out once Alicia got closer. “Wonderful.”

“Have you seen yourself?” Alicia winked.

“You’re right. I do look offensively hot.” Elyza smirked and pulled the chair for Alicia.

“Such a gentleman.” The eighteen year old smiled. “I’m glad you asked me out.”

“And I’m glad you said yes.” Elyza smiled, sitting on the chair across from Alicia. “Thank you mom for this too. She was the one who rubbed in my face earlier today that we were just friends.”

“My mom needs to chill…”

“I thought ‘just friends? Nope, I need to fix this shit’ and here we are at this expensive ass dinner.” Alicia opened her mouth but before she could say anything Elyza cut her off. “And before you ask, don’t worry about money or whatever goes around on the post apocalyptical world. Working for Azgeda has its rewards”.

“Then let’s get into this date, shall we?” Alicia smiled, sipping the red wine that had been waiting for her.

It was just like hanging with Elyza in her bedroom, but wearing fancy clothes. They laughed, talked about random stuff, had serious conversations about what was going on with the world, made fun of other people, played footsie under the table and feel into comfortable silence while staring into each other’s eyes.

Alicia was sure she had never felt happier than she was in that exact moment. They forgot about the walkers and the end of the world, forgot about Elyza’s issues and focused on how the Australian was acting exactly like she used to before they left the boat. Her Elyza was back and that was all she ever wanted and needed.

It had been about an hour since they had finished their dinner before Elyza’s phone made a small noise. The blonde read the text and smiled.

“Lincoln is outside.” Elyza stood up and held her hand out for Alicia. “I hope you like to dance.”

Lincoln was not alone this time. His girlfriend - and also Elyza’s friend - Octavia had joined them. Alicia and Elyza hopped on the back seat and the man drove away from the restaurant. Alicia liked Lincoln. Even though he was tall and strong he was a soft guy, but Octavia was intimidating. She wouldn’t judge before getting to know the girl better, but she felt like Octavia would kick her ass anytime if she needed to. 

The drive was short and they quickly pulled outside a nightclub and Alicia felt a little nervous again. She had never gone to a nightclub - she was only eighteen after all - and school parties weren’t her deal. The brunette just held Elyza’s hand as they walked into the place, music playing loud and lights flashing everywhere.

“To Elyza stop acting like a crazy psycho.” Octavia smiled, raising a glass filled with vodka.

“Wow, thanks, O.” Elyza rolled her eyes and took a sip out of Jack Daniels.

“To Alicia, for doing what we were useless to do and saving our girl.” Lincoln smiled. He was the only one who wasn’t drinking anything alcoholic since he was the driver for the night.

“Enough with the cheers.” Elyza rolled her eyes and grabbed Alicia’s hand. “Let’s hit the dance floor.”

She wasn’t sure if she indeed enjoyed dancing or she just loved dancing with Elyza. And with dancing she meant grinding against each other. Elyza took off her jacket and rolled her sleeves to her elbows like she couldn’t get sexier with those clothes. One music after the other they would get each other more aroused than ever. Alicia moved her hips against Elyza’s front, hand’s hooked around the Australian’s neck as the older woman’s hands traveled everywhere around Alicia’s body. The eighteen year old didn’t know what was making her dizzier, the alcohol or the way Elyza’s hands would grab her hips or run along her tight through the gap in her dress.

It was about four in the morning when they left the nightclub and as much fun she was having, she couldn’t care less. She was craving hard for Elyza and lips crashed against each other as soon as they hopped into the car. Elyza left her lips and started kissing down her neck and Alicia couldn’t hold in the moan that left her throat.

“Hey, not in my car you horny lesbians!” Octavia shouted from the front seat. 

“I didn’t complain when you and Linc fucked in my couch while I was home!” Elyza stopped kissing Alicia, but her had was still caressing the teenager’s tight.

“That was five years ago, Lex. Get over it!”

“It took me a year to get rid of the sex smell!”

“That’s because you kept having sex on it, you idiot!” Octavia reached her had to punch Elyza’s shoulder.

“That’s not the point, Octavia Blake.”

They couldn’t keep their hands from each other. Elyza kissed down Alicia’s naked back as the younger girl tried to open the door to the Australian’s apartment with her spare key. All Alicia could hear was Lincoln - who happened to be Elyza’s neighbor - shouting for them to be quiet cause he had to sleep at least an hour before going to work. Needless to say that they ignored the man’s request completely.

Elyza pushed Alicia into her apartment and grabbed the end of her dress, pulling it over her head. The brunette couldn’t care less about being wearing nothing but a thong in front of Elyza, instead she tore the older woman shirt open and pushed her pants down her legs skillfully. Both girls got rid of their shoes and Elyza pushed her panties down before lifting Alicia up and carrying her to her bedroom.

The blonde dropped Alicia on her bed and straddled the teenager, taking off her bra in the process. Alicia kissed Elyza deeply, hands running down Elyza’s naked body and moaning as she felt the woman’s wet and hot center pressing against her thigh.

Alicia lay on her back, bringing Elyza down with her. She tried to get rid of her underwear, needing to feel every inch of her skin touched by Elyza’s.

“Let me.” Elyza mumbled with her raspy voice against Alicia’s ear. The blonde’s hand ran down the teenager’s body and ripped her underwear with one swift motion, earning a loud moan from the girl underneath her. “Tell me what you want, love.”

Alicia buckled her hips up, trying to find some friction. She needed Elyza, she needed to feel her and the eighteen year old wasn’t sure if it was the arousal or the alcohol take made her say what she did.

“I want to fuck you.” Alicia answered and rolled over Elyza, capturing her lips in a heated kiss as their tongues battled for dominance.

“I wasn’t expecting that, but I’m totally fine with it.” Elyza smirked once Alicia left her lips and started to trail kissed down the blonde’s neck, biting hard enough to leave a mark now and then. 

Alicia slid her hand down Elyza’s body and cupped the woman’s center as her mouth worked on Elyza’s nipple, the Australian moans got a little louder every time Alicia used her tongue to move the ring adorning it. The brunette parted Elyza’s lower lips with her fingers, carefully teasing her clit now and then. The wetness that started to coat her fingers making Alicia’s juices flow more and more. 

“I could use some guidance down here.” Alicia mumbled against Elyza’s lipstick stained lips before pecking them a few times. The brunette felt confident, but she couldn’t ignore the fact that it was her first time with a girl.

“I’d like two of those, please.” Elyza smiled, asking Alicia for her finger’s just like she would ask a waitress for her coffee. Alicia let her fingers graze Elyza’s opening before sliding them in. “Oh God!”

Alicia started to move her fingers in and out, taking in every single noise that left Elyza’s mouth as she started into those blue eyes darkened with lust. The teenager could help but moan herself at the felling of Elyza’s wall around her fingers. She decided that those warm walls around her were her new favorite sensation. 

Her movements turned rougher and faster. Elyza’s juices started dripping into her palm and she was sure that if it weren’t for the loud moans that were leaving the blonde’s lips she would be able to hear the noise that the wetness caused every time she pulled her fingers into Elyza. 

“You’re doing great, baby. Keep going.” Elyza whimpered. Alicia kissed the woman’s throath, the moans vibrating her lips as she started to feel Elyza’s walls getting tighter around her fingers. “I’m going to come! Curl your… C-curl your fingers…”

Alicia did as Elyza instructed, her palm grazing over the blonde’s clit. It took only a few more thrusts before Elyza screamed Alicia’s name as her walls tightened around the brunette’s fingers and her body started to shake uncontrollably. Alicia went to pull out her fingers, but Elyza stopped her.

“Not yet… Leave them in.” Elyza smirked with her eyes closed. “I need to confess you that I noticed how great your hands looked from the moment we met.” The blonde said breathless and looked up at Alicia. “But this was… Your fingers are magical, love.”

Alicia blushed and finally removed her fingers from Elyza. The blonde grabbed her hand and took her fingers to her lips. The teenager felt her throat going dry as Elyza stared deeply into her green eyes and licked Alicia’s fingers clean while small moans left her lips.

Elyza rolled them over and attacked Alicia’s mouth with her own. The brunette could taste Elyza in her lips and she thought she had never tasted anything better.

“Now it’s your turn, love.” Elyza whispered against her lips before kissing down Alicia’s neck.

Alicia was so turned on already that she was sure it couldn't take long for her to come. Elyza stopped for a while on her chest, taking Alicia’s nipples in her mouth one at time and giving it the proper attention before Alicia’s hips buckled up looking for contact, showing the older girl that she was craving for more. 

Elyza kissed down Alicia’s body, going through her stomach and navel before opening the brunette’s legs and trailing her lips on the inside of her tights. Alicia’s breath got caught in her throat when she felt the blonde’s tongue running through the length of her center, stopping on her clit and sucking on it softly.

“Elyza…” Alicia moaned, completely emerged into the feeling of Eyza’s mouth on her.

The Australian kept on sucking and licking into the girl’s clit for a while before aiming down and sticking her tongue inside Alicia. The brunette moaned and grabbed two fistfuls of blonde locks.

“Slap me.” Alicia said, not thinking about what Elyza would think, only about her own pleasure.

“Wait, what?” Elyza looked up, eyes wide. She must have had heard wrong.

“Just fucking...Damn, El.” Alicia grabbed Elyza’s hand and leaded it harshly against her ass. “Slap me.”

“I fucking love you.” Elyza smirked before going down again and landing her hand hard against Alicia’s ass, getting a loud moan from the brunette.

Elyza brought her free hand to rub on Alicia’s clit while the other kept on working on her ass cheeks. The slaps combined with Elyza’s tongue and finger’s pushed Alicia over the edge as she came harder than she had ever had. Before she could even think about getting down from her high Elyza placed to finger’s inside her and started to pump them hard, hitting that sweet spot over and over making Alicia come again.

“Elyza!” Alicia screamed, numb by the orgasm that hit her before the first one had even left her. “Holy fuck!”

Just the sight of Alicia coming pushed Elyza over the edge. Without taking her fingers from the teenager’s pussy, the blonde straddled Alicia’s tight and started to grind against it. She was so aroused that when Alicia came down from her high and finally felt the wet trail that the blonde was leaving against her tight, Elyza’s body was already shaking over her.

The Australian lay beside Alicia and smiled, both girls breathing hard and covered in sweat.

“So…” Elyza smirked.

“That was…” Alicia breathed out, pushing the hair that had stuck to the sweat in her forehead away. “Jesus, I don’t even know. Why the hell haven’t we done it like, the second we met?”

Elyza laughed and rolled to her side, resting a hand over Alicia’s stomach.

“Cause you were underage back then, love. But you know what, I don’t regret not even a little bit. It was worth the wait.”

“Worth it? I think I never felt happier about being sexually frustrated for three months.”

“And I still haven’t shown you the Elyza Special.” 

“I can’t even imagine what that is, but give me a minute and we’ll jump right at it.” Alicia smiled. It was weird how comfortable she felt about sex next to Elyza. So much she had revealed one of her kinks without even realizing it when she had dated Matt for a year and never even mentioned it.

“Hey, so… hum…” Elyza caressed Alicia’s stomach, trying to find her words. “I didn’t hit too hard, did I? I was a little scared I would hurt you for real.”

“Actually you can hit harder next time. You were doing it really softly.”

“Jesus, you’re perfect.” Elyza pulled Alicia’s body over hers and kissed the brunette hungrily.

“Ready for round two?” Alicia smirked, kissing Elyza’s chest.

“I was born ready, love. Actually, ready is my middle name.”

“Nope, your middle name is Alexandria.” The brunette smiled before going back to kissing Elyza’s chest. She pulled the older woman’s legs apart and went straight to her inner tights.

“Yes, but you see… Fuck!” Elyza stopped her rambling once Alicia’s mouth sucked on her clit.

The night was only starting.

\-------------------------------------------------------

Elyza woke up before Alicia and took her time watching the younger girl sleep peacefully. She still couldn’t believe how lucky she was for having someone like Alicia loving her back. Her whole life Elyza had been disappointed and abandoned by everyone she cared about and now there was this girl who would try to understand and wouldn’t leave her even if she asked her to and Elyza could be more thankful for that. That love was all she ever wanted, all she ever needed.

The blonde leaned in and kissed Alicia’s forehead. Alicia made a little noise and opened her eyes slowly, trying to adjust them to the light in the room.

“Morning, red cheeks.” Elyza smirked, looking down at Alicia’s still reddened butt cheeks.

“Hey…” Alicia smiled lazily. “What time is it?”

“Noon. I didn’t have the heart to wake you up earlier.” 

“I’m glad you didn’t. I feel like I ran a marathon.” Alicia laughed lightly. “Everything is sore from my waist down. A good kind of sore, though.”

“I hope you never leave me cause you ruined sex with anyone else after last night.” 

“Good.” Alicia leaned in and captured Elyza’s bottom lip between her own. “Cause you are mine and no one else’s.”

“God, I love how that sounds. Say it again.”

“You are mine.” Alicia smiled widely. “Mine, mine, mine!” She repeated while pecking Elyza’s lips. “You know what else sounds awesome? Food. I’m starving.”

“How does vegan gluten free blueberry pancaked and coffee sounds?” 

“Huum… You do know how to get a girl on her knees, Lex.”

“On her knees or on all fours?” Elyza smirked, making Alicia hide her blush against the pillow. Last night Alicia had spilled basically all of her fantasies to Elyza, one of them being having sex doggy style. Elyza had gladly fulfilled that for her, but she didn’t think that the blonde would hold it against her for the rest of her life.

“You’re never letting me forget it, will you?” Not that she wanted to forget cause it had felt incredible. Everything about last night had been incredible. Elyza had definitely kept her word about fucking Alicia into oblivion cause she couldn’t remember how many times she had come, but she was sure it had been more times than she had ever come in her whole life.

“Not at all.” Elyza smirked and left the bed, pulling her hair up in a bun and grabbing a oversized t shirt from her drawer. “Sleep some more. I’ll wake you up once the food in ready.”

Alicia smiled and rolled around in bed. Even though she was tired she didn’t felt like going to sleep again. The teenager reached for her phone, just then realizing it was out of battery, so she reached for Elyza’s phone and plucked in her ear buds. Alicia had just realized she didn’t know what kind of music Elyza enjoyed. She was expecting some hard rock but instead she was greeted with really melodic and cute songs. Sure, there was some hard rock, but mainly indie music. Alicia smiled and rolled on her stomach, going thought the blonde’s playlist.

Elyza was almost finishing up the pancaked when someone knocked on the door. The Australian turned the oven off and ran to the door, not caring about being dressed in nothing but a t shirt. It was probably just Lincoln whining about the noise she and Alicia had done last night. Elyza opened the door without checking first, getting face to face with Madison.

“Madison… Hi.” Elyza said uncomfortably. She pulled her shirt down, suddenly getting self concisions. 

“Looks like you had a good night.” Madison said seriously, pointing at the purple marks on Elyza’s neck.

“Can I help you?”

“Have you seen Alicia?” Madison busted into Elyza’s apartment without permission.

“Would you like to come in?” Elyza rolled her eyes, closing the door behind her. “No, I haven’t seen her, why?” 

“Alicia was never the one to sleep until late, so I went upstairs to check if she was okay and she wasn’t there.” Madison scanned around Elyza’s apartment, taking in the clothes on the floor and the tray holding two plates and two cups of coffee over the kitchen counter. “Since you’re friends I thought you might know.”

“Well, I have no idea where she might be. Have you tried calling her?” Elyza followed Madison into the kitchen. That woman was invasive as fuck. 

“Her phone is off.” Elyza caught Madison’s eyes falling into the piece of paper where she had written the gluten free vegan blueberry pancake recipe. Alicia’s mom looked up at Elyza in anger. She wasn’t stupid. Probably everyone in a ten miles radius knew that was Alicia’s favorite meal.

“Madison…” It was all Elyza managed to say before Madison ran into her apartment and straight into her room.

The former school counselor stopped at the doorstep with wide eyes, staring at a naked Alicia lying on her stomach, ear plugs in and legs moving to the rhythm of the music.

Elyza walked beyond Madison, getting into the room and covering Alicia’s naked body with the sheets.

“Are the pancakes ready?” Alicia smiled innocently before she realized the look on Elyza’s face. “What’s wrong, baby?”

“Alicia!” Madison almost shouted, making the girl jump up and grab at the sheets that covered her.

“I’m sorry, she stormed in.” Elyza mumbled.

“Grab your things, we’re going home.”

“Why? For you to lecture me?” Alicia rolled her eyes.

“If that’s necessary, yes. Now let’s go, Alicia.”

“Go.” Elyza whispered softly. “I believe you two need to talk. If anything happens you call me and I’ll be there in a second.”

Alicia glanced between her mother’s angry eyes and Elyza’s soft ones. 

“Okay.” She whispered before standing up and going for her clothes.

________________________________________________________________________

The drive home was excruciatingly silent. Neither Madison nor Alicia opened their mouths until they arrived at their place. Once the door was locked behind them the show started, attracting everyone to stare at the fight and at Alicia’s messed up stated, sex hair, purple bruises and all.

“I didn’t expect that from you, Alicia. Disappearing just for me to find you like that…”

“Like what, mom? Say it!” Madison locked her jaw and stared at her daughter. “I was in my girlfriend’s bed and if I remember correctly you never freaked out about me sleeping at Matt’s house.”

“This is different, Alicia!”

“Why? Cause she’s a woman?”

“You’re not seeing Elyza ever again!” Madison ordered and Alicia rolled her eyes.

“I’m eighteen, mom! You can’t stop me from seeing her. You don’t dictate my life; you lost that right when you practically abandoned me after dad died!”

“That is not truth, I was always there!”

“No, you weren’t, Madison!” Alicia shouted. “You freaked out so bad about Nick doing drugs that you completely forgot about me! I had to grow up by myself, learn everything by myself cause you were never there! Do you have any idea how frustrating it was to hear the kid’s from school saying how much counselor Clark had helped them through their issues when you didn’t even cared about asking if your own daughter had any issues?”

“Is that what this is all about? A mother figure? You’re looking for what I didn’t gave you in Elyza from all people?”

“Don’t analyze me, mom. I’m your daughter, not a patient.” Alicia’s hand went through her brown hair as she laughed humorlessly. “And trust me, it’s not about a mother figure cause what we did last night is way far away from that. I’m so sore from the waist down that I’m sure I’ll be walking funny for a week.”

Madison slapped Alicia across the face. The older woman’s hands went straight to cover her open mouth, regret washing over her. Alicia just rubbed her own cheek and smirked.

“You know what I can’t understand? We are going through the apocalypse and you are worried about me dating a woman.”

“It’s not about her being a woman, Alicia! She’s an assassin!” Madison regretted her worlds when she saw the angry look on her daughter’s eyes.

“Shut up.” Alicia growled. “You know more than anyone else how much she regrets and why she did that. It was her job.”

“She killed innocent people.”

“And so did we. We’re no better than her or anyone else for that matter.”

“She’s a drug addict…” Madison almost mumbled. “I don’t want you to…”

“So is your son.” Alicia cut Madison off. “And you love him anyway just like I love Elyza. Nick’s also a drug addict and I don’t see you freaking out about him dating Ofelia.”

“Ofelia is not my daughter.” 

Alicia looked to the Salvadoran woman who had been watching the whole fight along with everyone else. The sad look in Ofelia’s eyes said it all.

“There you go again…” Alicia shook her head and tried to calm herself down. “If you payed just a little bit of attention you would have realized that she sees you as a mother. Open your eyes, Madison, before you end up losing the ones who care about you the most.”

Alicia went upstairs to her room and started packing up. She had already texted Elyza, asking if she could crash in her place for a few days to which Elyza happily said yes and even said she would be there in a few minutes to pick her up. Alicia couldn’t do that anymore, she needed a break from her family and especially from her mom. Thinking again she was just doing what she had always planned on doing which was moving out as soon as she turned eighteen, minus the college part that would probably never happen now.

“Are you really leaving?” Ofelia mumbled, stopping next to Alicia.

“I just need to not be here for a while, Of.” Alicia stopped her actions and looked at Ofelia. “I need some time to cool off and my mom needs some time to think. I’m not coming back until she realizes her mistakes and accepts my relationship with Elyza. I know that leaving sounds childish…”

“It’s not. Actually it takes maturity to face you mom with the truth and decide to give it a break. I’m twenty six and I’ve never did it.” Ofelia opened a weak smiled. “Just don’t be a stranger, okay?”

“I won’t, Of.” Alicia pulled Ofelia in for a tight hug. “I won’t.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my first time writing smut, let me know what you think about it so I can get better at it. 
> 
> Like I said before, Alicia is a smol cinnamon roll who likes it rough and no one is convinving me otherwise.


	11. Author's note

Hey there guys. I know it fucking sucks when you think there's an update but it's just an author's note, but listen to me really quick.

I'm sorry for the lack of updates. My life has been a mess cause I just dropped my mechanical engeneering major to pursue a career on the movie/tv industry. It's has been a mess but I'm really fucking happy about this decision. I'm taking a break from everything this week and I'll update this fic and post two Clexa oneshots. 

Once again, sorry for the absence.


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